After almost 10yrs of marriage mine has hit rock bottom and divorce is imminent. My wife is Bi-Polar and back in February she created the worst thing that could ever happen - the inevitable black hole where all earnings are sucked into the abyss to satisfy the desire for her to have a web page when she knew full well our earnings could not support that expense.
I had just received my 401k from LandAir, had an outstanding cheque for $275 for firewood and she decided, after we sold a web page because of the expense, to start up another one. Everything hit at the same time, house payment, the cheque, her web page bill etc - all was allowed for but her web expense hit first and into overdraft that has'nt been recovered from - I was'nt informed about it till she initiated the expense which was too late.
Now that black hole where everything gets sucked in and never released is doing its job - lost sat TV, phone on the verge of being lost, house almost lost and am trying desperately to try and save it thru the Fresh Start Program, power probably going to be lost soon. I had a job but over 3 weeks every cent I earned was lost in getting the overdraft up to date and in the end could'nt even buy fuel to get to work, plus her pay and I was on minimal pay till I found a better job.
So now she is moving into a unit, assisted rent because of her illness and leaving me high and dry floundering - I can't support her habit now so she runs - Dr's over prescribing meds and working one against the other. Solicitor being engaged in the morning! She also, since 14/5/07, has been thru over 200 pain meds. As far as she is concerned, she has done nothing wrong.
She was admitted to Tucker Psychiatric at Chippenham Hospital, Richmond, VA in March, also put on suicide watch.
I just hope I can get out of this mess somehow - of course her family supports her and I'm the ogre even though I'm trying to save the house but the marriage, too much damage has been done - there is no more I can do.

That is truly a sad situation to be in. You may have to consider filing bankruptcy to save what you have. You and your family will be in my prayers.

Do you think that once she's in a subsidized unit... and no longer in the house... that you will be able to get a handle on the bills?

I would suggest you talk with a lawyer and her medical providers -- and maybe even your state disability determination people to see if you can get her declared disabled. Perhaps you can get some assistance there, too, both with her living and medical expenses. And if not financial assistance, they can often provide a lot of guidance on how to keep afloat during her treatment.

By the grace of God, I've never been in your shoes, Aussie. But part of my job is working with past due accounts... particularly those that are difficult to collect... and the last thing I want to do is turn someone over to a collection agency that will ding his/her credit report. I do so only to those folks who are totally non-responsive to my requests to work toward a resolution of their debt.

So determine just what you owe and exactly what you can count on as income. Set up a realistic budget allowing for regular payment on your debt. Contact your creditors, explain your circumstances and your willingness to pay down your debt in regular installments... and hopefully they will be willing to work with you.

I really feel for you, Aussie. It probably feels over-whelming at times, but please know that I'll keep you and your wife in my prayers.

__________________

I agree with the previous post. Talk to a lawyer and see about bankruptcy and see what avenues to go down with the medical providers. Above all else don't forget yourself. I'll be praying for you and your wife.

WOW Aussie I feel for ya but I also feel for your wife.

THIS is certainly tragic and not to be taken lightly.

ARE you CERTAIN divorce is the right method here?

Just wondering as you have been with her thru thick and thin.

__________________