Finally the studies are coming out to support what I've ALWAYS said - if you want to have children, STAY HOME AND RAISE THEM YOURSELF!! Kids don't care about THINGS - you don't need to be rich to have kids. Make some sacrifices - give up the second car, give up the nights out, give up the drinking and partying, give up the fancy new clothes, stop buying so many toys, etc., etc., etc.

Kids just want one parent home to care for them 24/7 and love them. Once they go to school full-time, THEN go back to work.

If you earn less than $35,000 a year, you CANNOT justify putting a child in full-time daycare but people will not listen. "I have to work" is a crock. If you care about your kids, RAISE THEM YOURSELF or don't have them.

The only exception is single parents, of course, and that's a whole other discussion.

Stop trying to keep up with the Jones', stop living the high life and stay home for five or so years and have quality time with your children and impart YOUR values, YOUR morals, YOUR standards and you will reap the benefits for a lifetime. It can be done and done quite easily - most people just refuse to give up their "things" to do it.

Very interesting Brenda.

As for both parents working in order to afford "things" for their children -- "things" their kids may not even be aware that they "need", has always made me wonder if it's the "kids" the parents want "things" for, or themselves?

One of the many "things" parents think a child needs is a television, which I think further separates children from their parents. After 8 hours, or more, in a child care facility, to come "home" to sit for another few hours in front of a TV babysitter -- just seems to be counter productive. What are the kids REALLY learning? Reality?

What reality?
That they're expected to grow up as parents who both work to afford "things" that their kids aren't aware that they need? And the process continues. Will the circle never be unbroken?

Now-a-daze, it seems, children are being set up to fail as real parents. They see mom & dad, both working and leaving the raising up to who? Children are products of their environment -- they learn more by example that by instruction. What example are two working parents providing? And what kind of example do the daycare places provide?

Two working parents often complain that they're struggling for the benefit of their kids. But, won't the kids be doing the same thing as their parents when they become adults? Exactly WHAT is "enough"? Has life become one big competition? At what cost?

Perhaps parents should just provide the bare necessities and let their children decide if they want more. If they do want more, it should provide incentive for them to strive for "more", rather than having "more" handed to them on a silver platter, never realizing the hard work and sacrifices required to achieve "more".

Question to ask might be,..................
can "more" actually be LESS?

Just a thought I think I thunk.
And, as an added bonus, ....... it provided me with another excuse to post one of my looonng posts.
HeY!
You asked for it!

__________________
Pontificating Dogmatist

Well you two pretty much summed it all up, nothing more for me to say. We are condemming our children in exchange for a few pretty baubles.

Thankfully, not me at this exact moment. BUT....I'm teetering on having to go back to work p/t at least just to help provide the BASIC necessities for the family. Dh's parking lot has had too much broken down time, and instead of bringing home the bacon it's bringing home spam. Neither one of us wants me to have to do it....but I might not have a choice. And it's not to cover any fancy car payment (own ours outright)...and we are not paying on charge cards or buying expensive clothes...we're talking the basics here...and it sucks knowing I might have to do it. Hopefully I can get even more creative with the finances so that I don't have to.

How old are your kids, Mrs. Skidmarks? I think working part-time is great for parents once kids are three or four years old, depending really on the child. I put my kids in pre-school from age 3 twice a week for 3 hrs at a time and they loved it and it gave me a break to do anything I wanted to do without taking the kids.

Well, my kids are older. 20, 18, 11 & 8. And they're all either in school or working, so I guess when I think about it I don't really *count* in this daycare equation! Except that depending on work hours that I would find...it could possibly mean after school care. THAT is what we're trying to avoid, because our 8 year old has special needs, and I do NOT trust other people with her. (I am terribly overprotective)

I've had to beg & plead with my son's fiance' to NOT go to work and put their son...my Grandson...in daycare. I know they need the money...but dangit I don't want him in the care of anyone else. They don't either, really, so fortunately she has been putting it off. He'll be a year old next week.

Today's employers are getting better and better about job sharing and hours of work. Hopefully you can find something that allows you to be home with your 8 yr old. I doubt I'd trust anyone with him, either. Ever thought about working for someone like Convergys? They do "work from home" options now... and they pay you to do the training and everything... but only in the USA...

Convergys, you say?
Work form home?
Hmmmmmmmm
That sounds right up my alley.

Only problem is, can I trust myself not to move my home to Mexico?
I reckon if I did that to me, I'd be up the Rio Grande -- without impeler con canalete instead of where I am now -- up sheep-dip creek without a paddle.

__________________
Pontificating Dogmatist

Who in the world is Convergys??

I would loooooooooooooove to work from home! It would basically solve all my problems!

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They're a call center.

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