This ride is almost over...
Posted 05.16.2009 at 10.26 PM by ghostchild
I've never felt so detached from the enviornment around than this time when I came back home...I drove all night to get here from Harrisburg, PA....and when I got home...I just felt 'blah'....it's as if my mind, soul, body and spirit was somewhere else...
Today I finally kind of woke up...my spirit that is...I heard the birds, heard someone doing yard work, saw the sun shining...I sort of felt apart of things again...
And then the call came...the intrusion...'I have a load for you'....
I wish I'd never answered the phone...
I've been doing this long enough to know getting a load out during the weekend in no way matters on your paycheck...all it does is intrude into your weekend...
Nothing is consistant about the loads you get...one good load...you'll get 2 bad ones...2 good loads, you'll get one bad one...it all balances out...
Being away for so long, at least for me, is really starting to leave my personal life and interests at home is dissary...literaly....you can't just leave stuff you own alone without maintanance for weeks on end...with the sun hitting it and leaves piling on top...in the end it will cost you more in repair and maintance than any money you earned while out....
I need to make a change soon...for my own sake...
I try to make the best of it while out there...but...I find I'm becoming more and more resentful when home and having to leave.
I'm tired of my life being managed by 3rd parties who don't have my interest in hand at all...and the paychecks I've been recieving lately arent enough for me to justify being away from all I love and enjoy...
I will make a change soon...I usually always do...
Today I finally kind of woke up...my spirit that is...I heard the birds, heard someone doing yard work, saw the sun shining...I sort of felt apart of things again...
And then the call came...the intrusion...'I have a load for you'....
I wish I'd never answered the phone...
I've been doing this long enough to know getting a load out during the weekend in no way matters on your paycheck...all it does is intrude into your weekend...
Nothing is consistant about the loads you get...one good load...you'll get 2 bad ones...2 good loads, you'll get one bad one...it all balances out...
Being away for so long, at least for me, is really starting to leave my personal life and interests at home is dissary...literaly....you can't just leave stuff you own alone without maintanance for weeks on end...with the sun hitting it and leaves piling on top...in the end it will cost you more in repair and maintance than any money you earned while out....
I need to make a change soon...for my own sake...
I try to make the best of it while out there...but...I find I'm becoming more and more resentful when home and having to leave.
I'm tired of my life being managed by 3rd parties who don't have my interest in hand at all...and the paychecks I've been recieving lately arent enough for me to justify being away from all I love and enjoy...
I will make a change soon...I usually always do...
Total Comments 3
Comments
 | I know the feeling. I was recently let go by the company that I was driving for. I have been looking for work outside of trucking. 23 years of keeping someone elses promises is enough. Good luck. |
Posted 05.17.2009 at 06.30 AM by relic1228  |
| |  Ye thanks...I don't mean to sound like such a drag...but It does wear on your soul after a while...18 hour days cause planners are sloppy about asigning loads... You've already been up 9 hours...and they give you a load where you gotta dead head 140 miles, and then turn around and drive all night to stay on scheduale... And then when you get home your to wore out mentally and physically to properly enjoy your off time... And when you do recover...it's back out again... weeks, months, and seasons go by fast like that... I don't have many more weeks, months and seasons to give up...(I'm not saying I'm real old, but still life and time is limited for all...young or old or inbetween..) |
| Posted 05.18.2009 at 06.06 PM by ghostchild |
| | Dispatchers and planners are spoiled...they're use to drivers 'renagade' driving...they take it for granted after a while...until a driver gets burned out...and no longer wants to work 20 hour days...to repair their sloppy dispatching... Most people I know back home work 8 hours a day...with 1 hour off....and still bring home as much or more than what I make....8 hours...imagine that....if we only worked 8 hour days, alot of us wouldn't even make it to the shipper...(laugh)... |
| Posted 05.18.2009 at 06.09 PM by ghostchild |
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