Thats an easy question to answer.Were should i start.Lets see?
Well i am 46 years old and i live on the outskirts of town and i live in my 85 year old moms basement.I still have jimi hendrix posters on the wall not to mention led zepplin posters.I have an old fashioned bong that i actually collect from the 1970's head shops.OH i forgot,i still burn insence..I do this because i have no sence..
I have not been with a woman since 1975 and so i am not married and have no kids.I have 1 friend i met in 1976 his name is george and he lives with his mom too.He comes over once a week with a 6 pack off old milskawkies and we drink beer and burn candles and listen to led zepplin and the doors.
We really crank it up with my old rack unit i have since 1978.My mom cant hear so its perfect but when we get to loud my mom starts yelling down stairs
(JOHNNY TURN THAT CRAP DOWN).
I have free room and board in the basement so i do not have alot of debt.
I only bathe 2 times a month,have 4 sets of sweatpants and 1 pair of old smelly sneakers.I have no bills at all and my biggest exspense is
FOOD.See I weigh about 450 and stand around 5'5''.I love to eat.Not to mention i smell like a buffalo F.A.R.T..
On my trips i eat in my truck.My mom packs me canned ravioli,and mac and cheese and potato chips.Not to mention cookies and diet dr.pepper.
So i keep my expences very low,dont shower till i get back to my moms house(1 week later) and i make out pretty good at 60-70 cents a mile.I net around 300.00 a week for around 2400 miles.
When i am on the road i watch all i do and eat.I have a coffee can i put $1.00 a day aside for my ocassional dirty lot lizzard and run down smelly roach heaven $23.99 motel.I am living large being a trucker and i let you all no that on my c.b radio.I am a legend in my own mind.I make huge money and live like a king...
Well i will be on later my mom is yelling at me,i have to dry my smelly underwear and dry my laundry she just did and george is coming over with a six pack and a cheech and chong movie we can watch on my 20 inch color tv we got at a garage sale....be safe

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