Originally Posted by smurf-316

Things you have to believe to be a Republican today

(1) Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of Hillary Clinton.

Maybe Jesus does hate Hillary, but Allah loves her, as do his followers

(2) Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when W's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Saddam is a dead guy now, by his own peoples hands.

(3) Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

Embargo started by Eisenhower, a Republican. Expanded by Kennedy, a Democrat. Expanded again by Clinton, a Democrat.

(4) The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

Wait, I thought the New World Order people and Cheney were to blame for the War in Iraq.

(5) A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

I'm not concerned about what she does with her body, only with the body of the baby she is carrying.

(6) The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

As opposed to meeting with, and promising things to the Syrians you can't deliver, and voting on 100 year old genocide charges against a current ally.

(7) If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

Condoms in schools is doing a wonderful job isn't it.

( A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Which long-time ally would we be belittling?

(9) Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

They want it, we don't. They have to have it, we don't.

(10) HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

We would rather have you go to the Emergency Room and send the Bill to those of us who work.

(11) Global warming, evolution and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism is the only thing that should be taught in schools.

That's what parochial schools are for. You keep the public one's for the gang bangers and drug addicts. How's that been working out?

(12) A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Was Clinton found guilty? Have charges been brought up against Bush?

(13) Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

What does the Constitution say about carjacking? online predators?

(14) The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George W Bush's driving record is none of our business.

Hillary stole and broke federal laws. What did Bush do? driving is a state controlled activity.

(15) Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

Pray for him if you want, doesn't affect or concern me.

(16) What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Originally Posted by smurf-316

lol.
just the response i expected. that's one thing i like about Ronno.....he never let's me down.