OMG, Now that hilarious.HAHAHAHAHA

__________________

Two truckers met in a truckstop having not seen each other for awhile.
One of them was out walking his dog on the grass when the other hailed him and said "Hey, I see you've got a new dog. What'd ya name him"?
"I named him "Rep"", said the other, giving the dog a tug on his leash.
"Rep?", exclaimed the other, "What kind of name is that for a dog?"
"Actually", said his friend, "his real name is Republican. I just call him 'Rep' for short."
"Why in the world would you name your dog 'Republican' in the first place? asked the trucker.
"Well", said the dogs owner, "he whines constantly, will turn on you in second if your not careful and constantly leaves a mess for others to clean up."

__________________
"Men are respectable only as they respect." ~ Emerson

TOP TEN INDICATORS THAT YOUR EMPLOYER HAS CHANGED TO OBAMACARE:


(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you
enter the trailer park."

( The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

(6) The only item listed under Preventive Care Coverage is "an apple a
day.."

(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to
Goodwill last month.

(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is
not a typographical error..

(3) The only expense covered 100% is "embalming."

(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED OBAMACARE:

(1) You ask for Viagra and they give you a Popsicle stick and Duct Tape.

__________________

After observing Obama on the campaign trail and during his first six months in office, we have concluded that our President lives and governs according to his own set of "Ten Commandments." They're certainly NOT the Ten Commandments you learned in Sunday School. In fact, many are the direct opposite!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------[/quote][
I. Thou shalt have no God in America , except for me. For we are no longer a Christian nation and, after all, I am the chosen One. (And like God, I do not have a birth certificate.) SOURCE

II. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, unless it is my face carved on Mt. Rushmore . SOURCE

III. Thou shalt not utter my middle name in vain (or in public). Only I can say Barack Hussein Obama. SOURCE

IV. Remember tax day, April 15th, to keep it holy. SOURCE

V. Honour thy father and thy mother until they are too old and sick to care for. They will cost our public-funded health-care system too much money. SOURCE

VI. Thou shalt not kill, unless you have an unwanted, unborn baby. For it would be an abomination to punish your daughter with a baby. SOURCE

VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery if you are conservative or a Republican. Liberals and Democrats are hereby forgiven for all of their infidelity and immorality, but the careers of conservatives will be forever destroyed. SOURCE

VIII. Thou shalt not steal, until you've been elected to public office. Only then is it acceptable to take money from hard-working, successful citizens and give it to those who do not work, illegal immigrants, or those who do not have the motivation to better their own lives. SOURCE

IX. Thou shalt not discriminate against thy neighbor unless they are conservative, Caucasian, or Christian.][/quote]

SOURCE;© 2009 The Patriot Update

__________________
KC

"For every trucker with a headache,there is another with an aspirin in their pocket."

Tough Times Don't Last...Tough People Do

Obamacare Form Letter to be Issued to Select List of Candidates:
From the Office of United States Department of Health, Welfare and Human Life Services



September 1, 2021

[Social Security #]
[Address – 1]
[Address – 2]
[City][State][Zip]



Dear Citizen [Social Security #]:



Peace be upon you.



Our actuarial records indicate that you have achieved a life expectancy of [years] beyond the average life expectancy of your fellow citizens. Your longevity serves as a testament to the generosity of your government’s wise investments in health care made during this Administration. Now it is time to give back.



From this point onwards, our computer models indicate that your demands upon the resources of your government and fellow citizens are projected to increase rapidly as you approach the final chapter of your natural life. It is also necessary to acknowledge that you ceased becoming a net contributor to society upon reaching your mandated age of retirement of 79 years.



Today, our nation faces an unprecedented crisis as your fellow citizens still fail to meet their economic obligations to an economy and health care system severely damaged through the selfish actions of the previous Bush Administration. Our records indicate that your demands upon the government and your fellow citizens now exceed your net cumulative contributions to society. Under the recent Balanced Budget Act of 2021 approved by your constitutionally appointed Democrat Peoples Party congressional representatives, your medical and government pension benefits will henceforth be reduced progressively in order to better address your continued obligations to our most victimized citizens.



You will soon receive a prescheduled obligatory visit by your appointed ACORN representative to discuss the various options whereby you can make one more very generous contribution to your fellow citizens of the world. You are encouraged to carefully consider these options before making the choice that you feel will best accommodate your societal obligations. We understand and sympathize that this will not be an easy decision to make.



To help encourage you to make the right decision, we are pleased to inform you that, in his benevolence, our Guide and Leader, President Barack Hussein Obama, has signed an Executive Order that authorizes the Government of the United States to extend to you a Special, Time-Limited Offer. Should you opt to volunteer for dignified termination, your Government will recognize your generous contribution to your fellow citizens and the global environment with the following Five-Point Plan:


1. You can enjoy a deeply discounted, tax-free stay for a 30-day period at a government hospice resort located within your state of residence. You shall also be given access to an unlimited supply of Government-inspected drugs of choice to help you transition to termination in comfort.

2. Your immediate family beneficiaries shall be exempted from any and all liabilities for outstanding Lifestyle & Environmental Fairness Taxes due by you to the governments of the United States and the United Nations (limit: two beneficiaries).

3. Each of your immediate family beneficiaries shall receive a one-time, tax-free gift of $40,000 in the form of tradable Gore-Issue carbon credits, in recognition of your final and personal sacrifice in the war against CO2-driven climate change (limit: two beneficiaries).

4. Your designated beneficiaries shall receive a 2.5% tax-free commission on all sales of your organs, tissues or body parts, following termination.

5. Your immediate family beneficiaries shall also receive:

a. A personally signed letter of recognition from our benevolent Guide and Leader President Barack Hussein Obama, for your selfless decision and status as an Esteemed Citizen of the World (unlimited direct family beneficiaries)
b. An iPod collection of our Guide and Leader’s speeches that begins with the voice of our Guide and Leader saying “Michelle and I wish to personally thank you, Citizen [social security #], for your personal contributions to my administration, our nation and the global community.”

Citizen [Social Security #], time is urgent. As your wise Latina administrator and benefactor, I urge you to quickly skim and approve the contractual terms of this proposal, as this offer is subject to change after 21 days. Please direct any questions to your locally appointed ACORN representative during your scheduled visitation. Should you make the unselfish and socially responsible decision to accept our offer, your ACORN representative shall have available all necessary legal documents together with exciting color brochures explaining the personalized benefits and privileges provided by the many state hospice resorts located near to you.



Sincerely yours,



Esperanza De Color



Czarina - Citizen and Environmental Relations
Dept. of Health, Welfare & Human Life Services

Obamacare for seniors = Take a cyanide tablet and don't bother calling me in the morning. (I'll have a better chance of getting your vote after you're dead, anyway.)