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Today..... Bought the long awaited and coveted BUNN coffee maker. Next to power tools, an mans coffee pot reigns supreme.

Read the warning label, and the included instructions front to back. Important not to hurt new man toy

Ignored 3 key words before filling the tank the second time, which is required. But unnecessary for ALL other coffee makers.

Close the lid.

Did you know that little white stem that sticks out the top, holds ALL the water in the upper chamber, until you close the lid? I didn't.

My shoes should be dry in about an hour.

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He has erected a multitude of new offices,
and sent hither swarms of officers to harass our people,
and eat out their substance........

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution,
and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his assent to their acts of pretended legislation:

Declaration Of Independence
__________________

King George or Obama ????

My shoes should be dry in about an hour.


AND they'll have that fresh-roasted aroma we all love to wake up to!

I never set my trailer brakes when I pull into a truck stop. I stopped in Wytheville a couple of years ago got my stuff and pulled out. I thought hmmmm my trucks running funny. Hit the interstate ...man wheres that smoke comin from? Someone hollers on the CB that my trailer is smoking. I pushed in the brake and said thanks...I'll stop and check it out!

I reported available for dispatch today!

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Might be when I moved my truck loaded with hot chicken grease with the dome-lid open. I realized my mistake when I seen grease running down the windshield.

Told them I was single. That was always good for 2-3 months OTR back in the 80's. Then 3 days at home to let the logs catch up and back out again "or else".
(young and dumb, what can I say?)

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"We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm."
~George Orwell

Was in the FlyingJ at Apharetta, GA with a flatbed load. Tried to retighten the load with snap binders. Leaned all over the snapbinder putting everything I had into locking that binder. Well, you skaters know what happened next. I took the hardest shot to the jaw that I ever could imagine. Ive been in a buttload of fights and was never off my feet. This time tho, I got KTFO!

When I came to, I was on my knees staring up into the sun. I guess my eyes were opened for so long that they didnt work. I couldnt see. My senses slowly returned and it dawned on me that my head was in the wrong position. I started to panic, "OMG my neck must be broken!" I figured as soon as I moved my head, I was going to die. Another driver walks up , "Hand, are you okay?"
"I dunno."
"What are you doing? It looks like you are praying in the middle of the parkinglot"
"Cheater bar slipped off the snap binder. Just making sure my neck isnt broken."

Broken jaw. Neck was fine. Never happened again.

I once had to hook up to a trailer, it was sitting in a dirt lot, and the ground was sopping wet. I was in a JB Hunt cabover with no nose. I got out there in middle of the mud, and the drive tires started sinking. By the time I hit bottom the tractor was practically vertical, with the windshield pointed at the ground and the drive tires sticking straight up in the air. I'll just say I had some explaining to do, but I managed to not get in any trouble over that one.

Just came off 4 days at home. Friday, got my notification from the Feds that I could get my HazMat endorsement. So I did. Made a copy at home to give to my DM.

Left to come get my 1000 mile, 2-day load this morning (Monday).

Oops.

Driver's license is still in my copier, 74 miles away.

Load is gone. I'm sitting. And wifey will have to bring the license to me when she gets off work at 5PM.

While taking my final road test during driving school I was instructed to pull off the shoulder for an "emergency stop"...I got the truck stuck so bad that they had to call out a private tow truck and it ended up costing $300..thank god my instructors loved me...i turned on the girly charm and they laughed it off...