Oh god the Xerox one made me bust out laughing..im sitting here with the windows open getting strange looks from the people walking around

Best part is it's really true. The driver pulling the Xerox trailer never got it!

__________________
They call me Biscuit

The best thing about being a pessimist is very rarely do you let yourself down.

Quick! What's the number for 911?

__________________
I'm a man..........And I can change..........If I have to..........I guess.

# the Xerox story!

Good way to start my day!

wow the things ppl do these days that make u just want to ask "did u take your stupid pill today" but at the same time you laugh so hard at them

Like one of our drivers, wanting to know if he would be issued a MediCare card. Since they were deducting it from his check.

If I had not been standing there listening to him rant on and on about this to payroll...I would have never believed it.

The guy was in his 30's. And never grasped that it wasn't HIS insurance. And obviously, had never looked at a check stub in his entire life.

__________________
Insuring polititions fear that
which goes bump in the night.
Seek out their personal homes
and family members. -- SU 83
__________________

Had a teacher in college tell me a story about himself when he was and apprentise in England. HE was working on a milling machine and could not get a part to fit. Another older gentlemen walked by and told him to go to the stock room and get some elbow grease and the part will fit right in. So he went to the stock room to get some elbow grease. He waited in line and finally it came time for him to get some elbow grease. He asked for it and the stock room cleck said "let me check," he came back a little bit later and said "sorry, all out of elbow grease." Well there were a few people behind him laughing, the clerk played along and finally one of the guys behind him told him what elbow grease was. My teacher said that he felt a little embaressed, but he knew that it was all in good fun.

Years ago I was a frammer, and we were working in a large appartment complex, so they hired a few frammer with no experience at all. Well, one day I was working with one of them, he was useless, standing around all proud in his new tool belt and he would talk non stop, it was annoying. This kid was so green, we had to toe nail in some boards and he didn't know what toe nailing was (hammering in a regular nail in at an angle) So, I pretended to rummage through my tool belt and said, "Dang, we got to toe nail these in and I don't have any "toe nails", do you?". Well, he didn't, so I told him to go get some from the supply trailer.
Well, he was gone for a long time. Then lunch came and I found out what took him so long. He didn't find any toe nails in the trailer, so he asked another guy if he had any, the guy said no but I think Darren does, then Darren said he didn't but he should check with Frank, and so on. Everyone got in on it and just sent this kid all over the job site. We all just got a kick out of it, He was a good sport about it.

We had a kid a few years ago in the steel fab shop I worked in, who was fresh from high school. He came in on his first day (night shift) and was walking around looking for the basement door (in a one story pole building on a concrete slab) so he could get the shop foreman an aluminum magnet.

__________________
LIFE IS GOOD

Years ago at a radio station I worked at, we were installing a new studio control board and we sent one of the young office girls searching for the classic "left-handed screwdriver".

She did. And brought back a standard, slotted screwdriver. We never said anything else.