I need some input, please! My husband is telling me, that it takes him $100.00 for his five day otr trips. He has a coffee pot, inverter, and takes $50.00 to $75.00 worth of food on the road with him. He eats his breakfast from the truck, and also his lunch, if he has time to stop. All this $100.00 is suppose to be spent on his 5 dinners at night. His frig is well stocked in the truck. The reason I am bringing this up is, a good friend told me, he only spends $50.00 to $60.00 on the road, that meals in truck stops will only cost $8 to $10 and that is all. He and I are trying to figure out where the rest of this money is going, and why. When I bring up the subject, all He$$ breaks loose, and world war 3 is on. There has been mention of recreational sex lately, and this has me very, very worried. I have heard some very hair raising stories of this, and I want nothing brought home, if you know what I mean!
Can someone give me an idea as to the cost of being on the road for 5 days at a time. Only having to buy one meal a day, and all other expenses are covered. I am getting some very bad vibes, and this is giving me a very uneasy feeling. Things are not that great with him and I any ways, so this is only adding to the unrest.
Any help with this would be great! Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel for you I am in the same boat with my hubby I can relate on what you are saying

Ladies,

Let me be the first to ease your fears, somewhat. But not completely.

One meal with a drink can cost on average of $15. Breakfast is an $8 meal. And while your husband may have an invertor and a coffee pot. Depending on how hard he runs. He still needs to buy coffee from time to time. If he eats steak every night....daaamn.

5 days out then home? I would be smelling a rat too. Check his pay stub for additional advances through the week as well.

With that said, let me also state. I think your fears may be justified. At the moment, I have no invertor, fridge, micro-wave, or coffee pot. And I get by on less than $100 a week. As long as I don't run out of cigarettes or run into any huge tolls. Then I have to take an advance.

When I run an invertor and stocked fridge. I would generally use less than $50 per week. Even then I usually bring change home with me.

I know you may suspect infidelity. And based on the inventory list provided....it could very well be true. But it could be a simple mismanagement of money. But I'm not there, and I can't make that call for you.

Be careful what you wish for. If you're trying to maintain this much control over money. Even if you have reason. You're most likely having other issues as well. And money is a tough issue to deal with in almost any marriage, tougher than infidelity for me to deal with. But I'm a man.

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Team Players.....
It's hard for me to play professional team sports. On a minor league salary.

KCZLADY... First a bit of advice.

I know it may seem that he may be spending more on the road than you think he should be.

It is VERY easy to spend alot & not realize it. I know.

In my house hold I am the one who pays the bills does the books & keeps everything on the level with the finances, so I know where you are coming from. Believe me, my husband can burn through money like it's burning a whole in his pocket. He spends double what I do on the road. I could NEVER figure it out, so what I did was put him on an allowance, I had to, or we'd be broke all the time.

In my experience, men generally eat more than us, they need larger meals, mine drinks GALLONS of coffee & often doesn't have time to make it or is just too lazy to do so, it's much easier to run in & buy a cup, and that alone can run $10 to $12/day then even one decent meal is going to run a person at least $15, so figuring he's spending only $20/day that's not too bad...it could be worse.

And there could be other things he's buying as well...like munchies, water, etc. The more junk food he tends to buy the more it costs.

Best thing to do is have him keep receipts for EVERYTHING he buys for a week, then both of you will know where he's spending it...& therefore make adjustments as needed.

It seems to me that there are trust issues here & those need to be worked out. Give him the benefit of the doubt to begin with, he should be keeping receipts anyway, so that's the best way to get a handle on where & what he's spending his money on.

Hope this helps.

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Never Drive Fast than your Guardian Angel can Fly!

Thanks for all your replies, but, after today, there seems to be a bigger worry now. I point blank asked him where the money was going, and could he show me receipts, and $--t hit the fan. He came completely unglued, and before all was said and done, he took his stuff, and left. Went to the bank, and emptied out the checking account, and left me without a dime, or food in the house. Just mailed the truck payment Friday, soooooo, I guess it will be a bad check. Never wrote a bad check in my life, but now, thanks to him, I will have a black mark against me. I think I either hit the nail on the head, or hit a very sore spot, for him to go off the deep end, and say what he did, and threaten me the way he did. Had the phone in my hand and ready to call 911 for sure. It was a very bad scene, beleive me! I am disabled and can not work, or I would be out Monday looking for a job. Right now, I have nothing nice nor good to say about him, and wish right now, someone would give me a swift kick in my butt, for ever getting with this man. He is a liar, cheat, and a user. As long as I had all my money, all was fine, but after he seen to it, it was all used up, and mostly on him, cause of a bad gambling habit he had, then I wasn't worth the time of day. He got what he want, so pee on me now. Well, sorry to lay this on you but, I feel a little better for getting it off my chest. Tomorrow has to be better then today.Thanks to all for listening. All be safe, and God bless you all.

I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you. You mentioned he had a bad gambling problem in your last post. Could that be what is going on currently? Gambling can be an addiction just like alcohol or drugs, and perhaps he has relapsed. Again I am so sorry for what you are going through. I don't know whether or not to hope for you that you can work it out with him, but I hope you get whatever you want out of the situation. Blessings to you.

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"What I'd like to do is go down in history as the President who made Americans believe in themselves again." - Ronald Reagan

KCZLADY, Iam so sorry that this situation got as bad as it did.

I have always thought of a marriage as a team effort and when it becomes like a game of offense and defense, that's not good for either of you.

Money and Trust (can't live without) in a relationship.

I guess it comes down to either "Solve" or "Eliminate" a situation.

GOOD luck to you!

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