I think everyone knows that Chuck Norris can kick the fictional Jack Bauer's ###. Regardless of the fact that Chuck Norris can, and has done this in the here and now while Jack Bauer is completely fabricated, the Jack facts are entertaining.

1) If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".

2) If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

3) Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

4) Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

5) Jack Bauers calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

6) Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

7) When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer ####### hates lemonade.

Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.

9) Jack Bauer removed the "Escape" button from his keyboard. Jack Bauer never needs to escape.

10) Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".

11) Jack Bauer once double teamed a girl.. by himself.

12) When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.

13) There are no such thing as lesbians, just women who never met Jack Bauer.

14) Men are ok with their wives fantasizing about Jack Bauer during sex; because they are doing the same thing.

15) Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars.

I heard that's how the double mint twins came about!

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Jack can double team me ANY TIME

Speaking of time to umm day dream Jack is on TV!

Day dream...I wonder if that's how the WORLD got started!??

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