Why do we love children? - Truckers' Trucking Forum | Message Board

mc8541ss · **^ Top** #1 09.30.2008

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found him self in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop?'
'Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report.
'My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?'
'Yes, that's right,' I told her.
'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked.
'It sure is,' I replied.
Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'

DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.'
'And why not, darling?'
'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.
'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out.
'What have you got there, dear?'
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear !'

NOW IF THIS DIDN'T BRIGHTEN YOUR DAY, GO BACK TO BED AND FORGET IT

25(2)+2 · **^ Top** #2 10.01.2008

"Kids say thee darnedest things" Art Linkletter.

My work hours are just plain nasty, I need to stay awake most of the night, so on days off, I have insomnia. Thanks for the chuckles.

ssbowles · **^ Top** #3 10.01.2008

True story....we were on vacation a couple years ago, and were at my brother's house in Florida. We're all getting ready to go out to dinner, and my wife was jsut getting out of the shower. My 2 year old nephew comes busting thru the living room and right into the bathroom before anyone could say anything. After the initial surprise, he looks at my wife and says " Aunt Sam, you look different without your glasses."

MountainMama · **^ Top** #4 10.01.2008

Truth is funnier when it comes out of the mouths of babes!

honor roll · **^ Top** #5 10.01.2008

Kids are so cute

Texas-Nana · **^ Top** #6 10.01.2008

LOL I loved this.

Lilbit · **^ Top** #7 10.02.2008

The joys of the innocence of youth! I loved number 5! That's just priceless.

cat 500 · **^ Top** #8 10.02.2008

Kids can be so funny.

creekrd · **^ Top** #9 11.18.2008

Oh, how I wish I was 5 again and know what I know now !!!

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes	Rate This Thread
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode	Rate This Thread:

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Trucker Forum	Replies	Last Post
Top Wedding songs for the first dance	Cybergal	The Ladies' Room	16	09.05.2008 07.58 AM
Tough Love is 'REAL' Love!!	jamwadmag	A Discussion About EVERYTHING	24	12.30.2007 08.18 PM
Bush warns of nuclear-armed Iran	hrdman2luv	Politics	36	10.09.2007 11.09 AM
Dogs That Bite Children Have Often Not Bitten Kids Before	Cybergal	The Pet Stop	0	10.06.2007 01.35 PM
children gotta love them	Raetta	The World Is A Joke	4	04.30.2007 02.55 PM

Truckers' Trucking Forum/Message Board - The Premiere Truck Driver Forum
Sponsored Links

The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to mc8541ss For This Useful Post:
Baack (10.01.2008), cat 500 (10.02.2008), Cybergal (10.01.2008), MountainMama (10.01.2008), Passload (10.10.2008), Ron-MARS Trucking (10.01.2008), simplyred1962 (10.01.2008), Texas-Nana (10.01.2008), W5IT (10.01.2008)

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)