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Message:: [QUOTE="Snazzy, post: 542184, member: 9499"]Yep Mc85 the whole world would do better without all the crooks and Pj hit the nail on the head, 'no good deed goes unpunished, as Life Goes On'.   The weeks slowly passed by, as my savings account dwindled and I got more desperate. Yep, I couldn't find a job on a bet and the wolf was at the door. Well, a stray dog that I had named Lobo. No ! He wasn't a wolf, but a mixed breed mutt that the world had forgotten. Yep, we were quite a pair and had a lot in common. Lobo licked his food bowl, as I hammered down another cold one. Captain Hook spotted me and hoofed it over. I greeted him, " How are they hanging ? " Hook grinned, " Your a Hoot Barney ! Say ! One of the fellas in the bar the other night gave me this. He said, this outfit pays in cash and as long, as you have a CDL. Well, you might want to call em ! " I eyed the beer coaster, " I'll call em ! Is this their number ? " Hook gave me the look, " Yeah ! That's why I wrote it down there. Oh, have you heard anything ? " I was honest, " Nope ! TLX is fighting my unemployment benefits and that Idiot at the employment office is a joke ! My attorney keeps telling me not to take another job until we settle. " Hook petted Lobo, " Well I guess, I better get back and let me know how that works out. See you Barn ! " I sashayed inside and called the number, " Ring, ring, Midnight Movers ! " I cleared my throat, " Huchhkuumm ! Excuse me ! I have a friend who met  one of your drivers and ...." He whispered, " You got a CDL ? " I bragged, " Yes Sir, and it's clean as a hound's tooth ! I have all of the endorsements, T, A, M, P, E ,X, and M,O,U,S,E too ! I have a current DOT physical, 20/20 vision, my pecker is 14" long, I can leap tall..." The Whisperer had heard enough, " Go to the Flying Hook and see Lefty ! " So, I did. Yep, Lefty was seated in the third booth and looked like a Carny. You know, like a carnival worker and I sure knew what they looked like. Remember ? Back when I use to... Well, you know ! Anyway, Lefty was old, pale, and wrinkled. He had on a pair of plaid green slacks, a yellow jacket, and a red Alp hat, with a feather in it. His dark Foster Grants hid his beady darting eyes. Yep, ole Lefty was as nervous, as a preacher in a house of ill repute. I approached  him slowly, " Are you Lefty ? " He tensed up, " Who's asking ? " I introduced myself, " I'm Barney Goose and ...." He jumped up, " Let's go outside ! Hey ! Can you get this ? I left my wallet in my car. " So, I paid his meal ticket and caught up with him in the parking lot. He was hunched over the trunk and digging through the contents. I made small talk, " Nice looking old Ford ! What is that a 1956 ? " Lefty pointed, " Get in and I'll give you the low down ! " I shut the passenger door, " Man ! This is a classic ! " Lefty cranked her up, " I'll drop you off and this is your bus ticket. That's your in-transit tag, your insurance card, here's your logo signs, and this is your fuel card. When you get down there see Popcorn. He'll have your cash advance and give you the run down. Any questions ? " I stuffed the crap in my overnight bag, " Uh ? " So anyway, Lefty slowed at the corner and pushed me out. Yep, the good ole Blue Hound Bus Lines. I got a window seat next to a fat woman who was eating a gallon of ice cream, two hot dogs, a pizza, three bananas, four roasted hens, a bowl of chili, and the armrest. What a deal ! The evening to turned to night and Hippo Woman began to snore. By now, I was crushed between her and the side window. Fifteen hours later we pulled into the South Texas Station. A young girl pointed up at me, " Look Mommy ! A man's face is painted on the window ! " So, I peeled myself loose and sashayed off the bus. Now, I wasn't real sure where I was suppose to go. Yep, it was your typical South Texas bus station. You know, full of brown skinned folks, all jabbering in their native tongues, and toting carryall chicken cages. A wino looking guy holding a bag of popcorn approached me, " Barney ? " I nodded, " You must be Popcorn !  How did you know it was me ? " Popcorn led the way, " Your the only white man that got off the bus. Now, we're cutting this close and you'll need to get going. Go ahead and get on back and we'll be there in a minute. " I sat on back, " What is this a Vespa ? " Popcorn let her rip, " Our yard is just the other side the tracks. Now, never hang around there after dark, because it's a pretty rough area. " I agreed, " Yeah, for minute there, I thought that I'd slept through my stop and was in Peru ! " Popcorn stopped by the fence, " Here's your travel advance and that's your rig over there. This trip report has the destination on it and when you get it delivered they'll settle up with you. " So, before my feet were firmly on the ground ole Popcorn buzzed off in a cloud of dust. I shouldered my overnight bag and slipped through the cut cyclone fence. Yep, the yard was filled with junked wrecked rigs. It looked like a ... Well, like a junkyard of wrecks. Well, you know what I mean. So, I sashayed over and read the unit numbers. You know, the numbers on the bumpers. Let's see, Y-670, F-2024, B-52, 12406, GU-994, Bingo ! That's got to be it ! What the hell is it ? Hmm ! Looks like a crane or something. Man, this is silly ! Look at those bald tires, broken windows, missing lights, and what's that ? Grease ? Oil ? Transmission fluid ? Gees ! I bet, this piece of junk doesn't even run ! Look at that ! The door won't even open ! This is silly and I'm not going to drive that hunk of junk. Well, don't tell me ! Go call that number and tell them that !  Oh, shut up mind voices ! No ! You shut up and quit your belly aching ! What a deal, as Life Goes on. Nightie night Snazzers, your Snazzy1.[/QUOTE]

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