to the wife out there?

Discussion in 'Questions From New Drivers' started by thedotsonwife, Feb 23, 2007.

  1. thedotsonwife

    thedotsonwife Bobtail Member

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    Feb 23, 2007
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    I was just wondering how would my kids understand that daddy has to do this just where they would have a good life. How can i tell my 2 year old and my 1 years old that daddy will not be here at night to help mommy put them to bed. :crybaby:
     
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  3. Cybergal

    Cybergal Road Train Member

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    A job in the Trucking industry is tough not only on the person who has to be away from home but also on the family environment.

    It takes a strong woman to face being alone, and dealing with family issues as they come up.
    There is maintenance of the home and paying the bills and so on.
    All of the responsibilities fall upon the one that's at home.

    As a family his job should be agreed upon by all family members.
    This job should be laid out on the table completely before even considering this type of employment.

    As far as the children in this, They may never truly understand why DADDY'S job takes him away from the home.

    KEY thing to do is to keep busy and your mind occupied while he is away.
     
    truckerswife11 and redneck31 Thank this.
  4. Bittersweet88

    Bittersweet88 Bobtail Member

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    hang in there. i was married to a trucker for 4 yrs, so know about being the one left at home. but i didn't have the added burden of explaining it to little ones.

    just a couple ideas off the top of my head...

    put up a laminated map and let 2yr old put stickers on places daddy is driving to/thru so he/she can "see" where daddy is.

    you could start a collection for kids... have daddy bring a little something from each place he goes.

    or a photo album - pics of daddy at funny landmarks, roadside stands, different agricultural stuff (cotton, orange trees, redwood tree...)

    hope some of this helps. keep in touch... i'll watch for ya here.
     
  5. luvmyhubby

    luvmyhubby Road Train Member

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    First , glad to see you joined us! There are some pretty sharp women here and I am sure they will have good ideas for you and your kiddies.

    The one year old wont really be that affected by dad being gone, the 2 yr. old will let you know what their needs are as the days go by. The best thing you can do is NOT talk about daddy being gone, and ALWAYS make sure they get to tell daddy bye bye when he leaves. They are so young that I doubt if it will matter that much right now.......JMO

    I also like the idea of getting apicture of daddy with his rig and putting it in a photo album for the 2yr old.....I did this with children when they had problems adjusting to daycare, mom would put pics of family, pets etc in album and we would talk about them during the day if the child wanted to or was having a rough time.
     
  6. thedotsonwife

    thedotsonwife Bobtail Member

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    Feb 23, 2007
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    Thank you so very much, they are very good ideas and i will try the pic for my 2yr old son, but my 1yr old daughter will not that daddy is gone and i will have to find something for her. I know that it will be hard at first but i hope that it will get so much easyer I think that after he starts then it would be easyer on the kids and i. if i have any other questions i will let you know thank you so much the dotson wife
     
  7. arigo

    arigo Bobtail Member

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    Feb 11, 2007
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    1 and 2 sounds far too young for them to really understand any of it. It's probably pointless to try. Have you ever considered changing your job if you care about being around your family so much? I definitely wouldn't want to be a trucker if I had a family.
     
  8. Aligator

    Aligator Light Load Member

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    Lots of times they 'get it', but I think they'll mostly get it from you. Your attitude is the one that counts; that's what they'll pick up on.
    You sound like someone who is committed and ready to back him up....and he's lucky to have you.


    PS....be sure to sign up for the 401K plan.:smt023
     
  9. notarps4me

    notarps4me Road Train Member

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    The one word that caught my eye here was the word {was} and a lot could be read into that. I am by no means trying to pry or be mean just wanted new drivers to realize that trucking is rough on the homelife. Many couples don't make it. Not putting anyone down here. I have read a lot of post about new couples starting out and wanting to start a driving career. Lots of marriages have not worked out with a full time trucker and a part time husband and father. Bittersweet, I hope you are not thinking I am aiming anything at you. Your husband could have quit driving, or passed. not trying to say that your relationship did not make it here. Just thought it would give potential drivers something to consider.
     
  10. Truckerjo

    Truckerjo Road Train Member

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    Let me tell you how I keep in touch with my kids and wife.
    1. I have a laptop
    2. They have a computer

    I bought 2 nice computer cameras (don't go cheap here cause you don't want to get that still frame crap (kids don't like that) Another thing when getting a camera for the truck make sure it has poor lighting enhancer, this way they will actually be able to see you in the truck)

    I have sprint wireless card plugged into my laptop (most cell phones nowadays can act as a modem)

    So every night I get to see my kids and they get to see me. Sure is way better then the phone. And the kids love it.... They get to show you things that they did at school or what mom got them at the store. It helps and almost makes it seem like you are there with them.

    Unfortunately it is not a cheap thing to get all set up.
    Laptop (you don't need a fancy one, this price range will do all trucker needs and even run GPS moving map software like Co-pilot)

    Laptop $500-600 (again you don't need a fancy one)
    Home computers $500 (you may already have this)
    Camera for the truck $50-70 (don't go cheap for the truck/poor lighting)
    Camera for the house $25
    Internet for the truck
    (well this is tricky, if you have a phone and it has a built in modem then you can get Internet for low as $10, I have sprint and know a trick to get it free threw a phone (srry can't share this info with you). if you go the phone route basically you plug the phone to your laptop with a USB cable. If you go a wireless card route it cost anywhere from $15-50 if you have a cell phone with that company already. If you do not have a phone with the wireless card route it can cost you from $40-80.)

    Internet for the truck $10-80 (depends on what setup you get)
    Internet for the house $15-50 (at the MIN you need dsl, Dial up will not work, dialup is to slow, prices all depend what package you get. really 128K/256K is all you need for you house anyways.)

    What does it cost me a month to speak with my kid with video camera?
    Subtract my cell phone bill because I already would have that anyways.
    $45 bucks a month (this includes Internet in the truck and at my house)
    Well WELL worth it my man, feels like I am at home when I am not.

    Oh something that is cool I leave the laptop on almost all the time, I use it for Co-pilot.. But I also leave the camera on and my kids or wife can see me at any point of the day from any computer with Internet (unless i turn the camera off) I have a pretty fancy Camera that they can move around to see out the front of the truck to see the weather I am driving in, Or how horrible the traffic is that i am in. Just something else they like to do with it...

    Hope that Ideal helps you out. I know how hard it is to keep your family together being a driver, $45 bucks a month goes a long way when you can have something like this.
     
  11. JaxTruckerWife

    JaxTruckerWife Bobtail Member

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    Feb 24, 2007
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    This is what my husband and I are planning on doing (once/if he gets hired). It also has some other benefits for the more adventurous couple :oops:
     
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