Is 3 weeks on 1 week off viable for maintaining a positive relationship with my significant other?

Ok, if I read this right what you are saying is that (for example) you live in Minneapolis, but you are sent to Madison Wis and live out of a hotel for 3 weeks before going home. Did I get that correct?

Assuming the answer is yes, what is stopping HER from coming to YOU for a weekend, or for a week even (depending on her work schedule)?

 

A friend of mine who lives near McAllen TX, left home for Los Angeles. He was in New Mexico when his wife called and told him that a tornado just hit and ripped the roof off their home. He told the wife that he would call her right back. Moments later, he calls her and tells her that he has friends coming over to put a tarp over the house and for her and the kids to go to a hotel. He would be home in time to meet the insurance agent.

A mutual friend of ours told him that he would have turned around and went back home. Why? “For emotional support!”

My friend told him, “A woman responds according to the Man you are. My wife knows that when I say I have it handled, it’s handled. She doesn’t worry. You don’t wait until tragedy strikes to build trust, and then suddenly she has to rely on you.”

They’ve now been married 40 years and have grandchildren.


On the other hand, you said something about her being a loner with no friends. That’s a red flag. You can’t be, nor should you strive to be the source of happiness for another person. We should be happy alone and invite others to share in ours…not be unhappy and look for an external source.

 

I work nights but sleep in my bed everyday. my wife doesn't have to work but I'm pretty sire she still doesn't like me. all depends on the people involved

 

Each person is different. Some may say her being more of a loner is a red flag but if she is like my wife, being happy if the family and thier drama stays away thats not exactly a red flag. Not being happy and content when alone would be.
In simple terms each person is different and you need to have a very honest discussion and take on the real hard questions. Her response not just in words but expressions you see when the hard things come up will help you sort out your comfort level with the answer she gives.
Then you can begin to make your decisions.

 

I always said to them; "handle it and let me know what you did".

I trusted their judgement to be able to handle the kids and house in my absence.

 

Find something that gets you home more often, soooo many jobs out here

 

DITTO

 

DITTO

 

This last paragraph.....really wisdom here. I heard a lady say the same thing on a podcast recently. She used the phrase, "You must have a good relationship with yourself." I do find that people are too reliant on others or tangible items to make them happy. You're right. Happiness starts from within. One must choose happiness instead of chase it.

 

It all depends on how understanding and strong each side is. Most ladies want a relationship that has a particular look, a prototypical look. I have been an OTR driver the whole time my wife and I have been together. Sure it gets trying sometimes, but it's worked. She's been provided for, protected when adversity hit, and the works. Some women think you can just run home whenever they feel down or when #### hits the fan. It ain't always possible to do that. If you have a woman that's not ignorant to how trucking works.and she backs you, you'll have a successful relationship. If not, it's going to be rocky.

I have a friend who's wife after all these years thinks he's supposed to come home after every load. When he's away, they argue. When he's there, it works to perfection. After 13 years of trying to accommodate her while doing this line of work, he hasn't done as well in trucking as he should, at least in my view. He always took lease purchase jobs, or company jobs that had him home weekly but weren't the most consistent when it came to pay. Some people are just unwilling to sacrifice anything at all. They think you can OTR and have bank teller hours and benefits. As long as both understand the lifestyle and sacrifice, it'll be gravy.