Refusing local job offer due to family trouble

My mom had a stroke yesterday and there was some pretty extensive brain damage. She needs somebody there to take care of her while the wife and I get a caregiver assigned. I can't stay in Tucson I haven't been hired by the company, but they've given me the offer and done the background check, now I have a drug test scheduled but I need to get up to Oregon ASAP because she doesn't have anybody else to take care of her and the house. Maybe I should have waited but I'm already past Los Angeles. The thing is I still haven't told the HR lady because I'm afraid that after I tell her, she's gonna turn around and put a failed/refused drug test on my DAC report like 3 weeks after I got my CDL. I'm not really asking for advice, I'm just exhausted and kind of venting.

 

You'll only get a drug test refusal if you leave a testing facility. Be honest with them and take care of your business. Considering how difficult it is to hire drivers they'll probably keep the offer open for you.

 

Family emergency is an uncomfortable fact of life. Explain what happened, no reasonable person would hold that against you.

 

Call HR and let them know what's going on. Soon. You don't have anything to lose by doing that and they might hold your job for you.
If you disappear without an explanation I doubt they'll take you back.

 

I just got my cdl. Family issue after family issue has slowed this entire process down. But the two companies I'm choosing between still have my job opening waiting for me when I'm ready. Just let them know what's up. You're not the first person that's had a family emergency.

 

The most amazing part is that you found a job in Tucson, the economic black hole of the southwest.

 

lol, lots of jobs in Tucson. There are at least 4 carriers working out of here. However, I'll be starting in either phx, or california hahahah.

 

Never mind all that.

The drug test did not happen provided you never put eyes on the facility.

Go take care of your mom. DO be prepared for various challenges related to end of life situations. Caregiving is a very expensive process for those who have money to do it and very draining for those who dont have money to do it. In fact, review your home state's laws (Where your Mom is) Filial Laws regarding parental care. It may be very possible that the doctor may order the mom to be sent to a nursing home where they will take all of her check and provide a level of care that you cannot provide long term.

Some things are in fact more important than trucking. Go take care of Mom.

 

Thanks for all the support guys. I'm in Oregon and we're hanging out at the hospital. Mom's awake and thankfully not a vegetable, but she's not quite there 100% atm and we don't know what our plan is yet. We'll get back to Tucson soon enough and the HR lady said she would hold my job for me until mid January. So I guess we have as happy an ending as we can get out of this.

 

I'm sorry to hear about your mom.