Stall Selection Criteria

I just get a nice clean shower

Considering how contagious a stomach virus is, I’d find an alternative to the general restroom.

 

Fire back after chili cheese roller dogs.

 

That's what shower points are for. A whole bathroom to yourself, no questions asked

 

I line the sink with a walmart bag, poop in it, then throw it over the top of the stall of the guy letting loose the burrito mudslide. I then immediately proceed to get some Popeye's chicken, without washing my hands.

 

Funny story...

Back in the Army, we went to the desert at NTC for a month. While there, the females were whining about the porta-johns being all messed up. They complained to the right folks, and 1/3 of them were blocked off as "Female Only" (never mind that only 1/6th were female). Within 3 days, we started catching the females in the other units, so we put "Male Only" on the rest of them. They were still using the male ones, so we checked... HOLY SMOKES THEY DESTROYED THOSE PORTA-JOHNS in less than 3 days!!!

Yeah, fairer species my rear. NASTY!!!

(apparently they were all afraid to sit on the seats so they would squat and hover, getting pizz and shizz all over the place, along with the bloody tampons and pads being tossed everywhere)

 

I walked into a rest area along 80 in NE one time a couple years ago and there was the most disgusting fat guy on the planet in there that had made the place smell like nothing I'd ever smelled before or since. I seriously had to turn around and walk out and use my Gatorade bottle.

 

I have cussed out a few people for their odor... like "SunuvuBeeeech!!!! Does your nose not work AT ALL?!.... you smell like a rancid mopwater and diarrhea sandwich on sourdough...."

 

Mr Mopwater needs to join Colonics stat.

 

I’ve been in some,where the guy in the stall next to me sounds like a white Volvo Chicago outfit air dryer going off every 30 seconds “pppfffsss”.

 

This dude was just walking around all rancid... I would aaaaalmost understand if he was pinching a loaf..... but this dude was just funky for the hell of it.