Where is everyone #5

Between 1999 and 2009, I went on 13cruise ships. 10 Royal Caribbean, 1 Norwegian, 2 Carnival. I prefer Royal Caribbean and a 7 day cruise. Carnival has too many low class individuals on it (you tip the staff at the beginning of the week instead of at the end…imagine going to Ruth Chris’s and having to pay BEFORE you even get a menu…who does that?)

I prefer to stay on the ship and chill. Getting off a ship in the Bahamas or Jamaica or Haiti or worse…HONDURAS is just going to set me in a foul mood. Tourist traps. You get off the ship and they have a bunch of these grass huts. The locals try to pressure you into walking in and when you walk in they put some “hand carved” object in your hand that you see in every grass hut in every island. Suddenly, they try to intimidate you into buying this thing. That’s not going to work. If you’ve seen one grass hut, you’ve seen a billion. There’s no point in getting off the ship.

This morning, I wanted to find out how many other cruise ships other than the Titanic have sank. The last one was the Princess of the Seas. Unfortunately there are other issues than sinking. I remember 5-6 years ago, the cruise ship losing power and took a week to be rescued and a bunch of starving stinky passengers on board. Then I saw this


All from a cigarette butt. #####. Can you imagine being stuck in the ocean, happy arse asleep, 3am alarm goes off and your room gets burned up because of some drunk and his cigarette? 20 years ago, this would not have bothered me, but now…? Been wanting to go back on a ship, but the more I think about it, the more I rather stay on my motorcycle with my guns. I would have never thought that I would become the grumpy old man, but apparently it is happening.

Don’t get old, gents.

 

It gets even worse!!

 

The other alternative is not very enticing either.

 

Never been on a ship but I think I'd prefer it to flying if I were to go somewhere. I can at least tread water for a bit if I have to. I can't tread air.

 

What got me on the cruise was I was bored with it pretty quickly but stuck at sea.

 

Had a friend who worked on cruise ships for 20+ years. Singer/pianist who also did stand-up comedy. He also did astrology workshops during the day. The cruise lines loved him for having so many talents.
He told me to avoid Carnival Lines at all cost. I think Royal Norwegian was his favorite

 

What about the sharks?

 

I heard a rumor if your mean enough you just bite em back

 

That's what I'm afraid of. Wife is set on an Alaskan cruise in the next 18 months.

I'm fine with Alaska, but would much rather drive. She hates my driving cause we don't stop.

I'm pretty #### sure we'll be cruising. I haven’t been on one. Several friends love em, but more for the drinking. I quit drinkin, so that’s out.

I guess we'll see