Fear Is Not A Stop Sign

I would suggest you see a Psychiatrist. You have been mentally scared, it happens. This is the kind of thing they pay those guys the big bucks for, if you have good health insurance it might be covered. I am not going to suggest that your husband quit his job, but if he has other alternatives he maybe should consider them until you are in a better state of mind. My wife's opinion certainly entered into my decision to quit trucking so early, it was not the determining factor but it was certainly put on the scale. Everyone has their breaking point, so don't feel embarrassed about seeing a counselor.[h=1][/h]

 

The good thing is you know you need to get over it. I imagine it will just take time, and forcing your self to get back out there. My stepdad had an accident over ten years ago, he was on the highway, turned to check his blind spot and when he looked back forward all traffic had come to a complete stop. He totaled his car and the pickup he hit. They both walked away uninjured, but ever since then he will not check his blind spot, just puts his blinker on and gets over. He is the scariest person I have ever driven with and, no matter what any one says to him he doesnt think he's doing anything wrong for some reason. At least you realize the accident affected you and your trying to get help. I hope it all goes back to normal for you.

 

As for him driving in snow and ice. He should never drive if he's not comfortable with the road conditions. No matter what his dispatcher/company is telling him, he is in charge of that truck. Now that does not mean he should park it if he see's a snow flake fall. But if the roads are truly bad he should just find a place to park and wait it out, NO LOAD IS WORTH YOUR LIFE. That being said will there be times he has to drive on roads that make him uncomfortable? Yes, sometimes your driving along and road conditions deteriorate fast. As long as he's a good driver and he adjusts his speed to road conditions he should be able to make it to the next safe place to park without an issue. As he get's more inclement weather driving experience in he'll get used to it. He'll learn theres a point that even if your comfortable driving it just makes more sense to stop. If you can only average 25mph and you know you have 200-300 more miles of storm to drive thru I will usually stop for the day and let them get the roads cleared. Why drive all day to make it 200-250 miles? If you continue on parking will usually be almost impossible to find also.

As for busy citys the only thing I can say is drive very defensivly. Be very aware of whats going on all around you. There are some accidents with big trucks that just cand be avoided. (Sometimes it seems like some of thes 4wheelers want to get hit) But for the most part if he's carefull he should be just fine.

 

Trust in the Lord with ALL ur heart and lean not to ur own understanding...Acknowledge HIM and HE SHALL direct thy path.

Nothing happens by accident! If you are a child of God everything that happens to you happens for a reason. Seek the Lord for the reason and trust Him to keep your man! Knowing that God is in control is how the wife and I are able to haul these loads of explosives. We have to know that nothing will happen to us that is not His will.

 

The best way is to face your fears. My girl is/was scared of going over bridges. When she was little her moms car would break down atop the delaware memorial bridge. Any time we went over it she makes me drive in the middle 2 lanes. Cant drive next to the edge. Slowly id start driving in the right lane part of the time putting her next to the railing. She got more comfortable with it. Now it doesnt bother her as much. Next up is the burlington-bristol bridge. 2 lane NARROW bridge with steel decking. If she doesnt freak out on that on, i think i cured her.

Point being, ya gotta face your fear. Im not saying drive thru atlanta during rush hour but slowly work yourself up by driving in town a bit then move to a rural area of a interstate highway, ect. ect. As far as the hubby goes im sure he knows his limits as far as bad weather. Driving in snow is a situational thing depending on how bad, ice is a 'im parking it until the salt trucks come out' type deal. He is the one to make the call in those conditions and im sure he isnt an idiot or super trucker. Good luck to you, YOU CAN DO IT!!! Face your fear and show it that you are the boss.

 

I'm stating the obvious, but you have a phobia of driving/riding in a vehicle. I think phobias are prettymuch defined has an over exaggerated fear that interferes with life. The way that they're treated is by very gradual exposure to said phobia. An example I've read would be if someone had a phobia of spiders they would start with viewing pictures of spiders, then perhaps video, then be in the same room with one. Eventually, they would work up to something like having a tarentula walk on them.

You can do this yourself, but you're more likely to succeed if you have a decent therapist (no idea about psychiatrist) to administer this exposure technique. If you go to a psychologist, they can't administer drugs. It can't be cured by medication as far as I know, although I guess a MD could prescribe something like anxiety pills if they wanted to lessen the effects...I know nothing about that.

The only reason I know about this is because I have a phobia myself. I've had it for about 10 years (since I was about 10). I could go a lot more into my phobia, but to summarize I was able to crudely expose myself to it and it got a little better, but not cured. I'm available to avoid it fairly easily in day to day life, so I've never sought official treatment. I won't go into any more details here since it's quite different from yours and most phobias, but you can message me if you want to know more about it.

 

As someone who has suffered with panic disorder off and on I can tell you that facing your fears isn't always the end-all to getting rid of them. You have been thru a traumatic experience and only acceptance and time will eventually heal all wounds. Fear should not be a stop sign,but don't feel weak or guilty if you are not ready to run the stop sign over just yet. It can take lots of prayer,time,and patience. And maybe even therapy. Dont be ashamed to seek it. It isnt a sign of weakness. Medications should only be a last resort as they can be hard to taper off of. I have never taken any of them. With time and mindful healing we all do eventually get thru this. Just don't feel bad if it doesn't happen overnight.