18 wheels or trash hauling?

Yep, do the trash truck until you get it figured out what you really want. Maybe in a few months you'll be ready to hit the road as a single man and see the country.
Keep that CDL-A clean and the DOT physical up to date.
Which state and nearest town do you live in; maybe there's more choices than the trash truck and more choices than Knight.

 

Alright, hand...honest talk:

Your marriage had severe issues before you went OTR. She was going to step out regardless if you worked local or OTR.

Now, here's where the hurtful part comes in. She doing it right and you're doing it wrong. Other than the kids, you have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to talk about. Why is it that you keep on trying to talk to her? "Closure?" Possible reconciliation? Don't do that...that's pathetic. Being pathetic is actually the thing that turns the women off and make it easier for another guy to talk her out of her pants. A woman has to be able to respect her man. If she can't respect him, disaster is brewing.

This coworker...was he a friend of yours? Yes? Even more so of a reason to avoid conversing with the ex wife. He's scum. Forget about him and her...how are the kids dealing with the split?

Which job to take? The one that's a closer step to your long term goal. Time to focus on you and your gials.

Luck in battle.

 

The worst thing you can do to yourself AND your children is to start "shacking up". Stay focused on work and children. Find an occasional 'partner in crime' who is likely living under the same circumstances (divorced, raising children--ping ponging children between both parents) and just seek "play dates" when "nature calls". Divorce is dreadful (I spent most of my childhood ping ponged between my parents who shacked up regularly and destroying my sense of safety and security) and I'm convinced it (divorce) is the very reason out society is in such a state of decline; no one is home anymore to raise their children. Why 'motherhood', 'fatherhood' and 'parenthood' aren't placed upon a pedestal it is so deserving of is beyond me. You two may have been lousy as husband and wife but you both can still be GREAT patents to your children.

 

i'd make sure the divorce is settled.

from there, i do know that (here at least) trash hauling locally, can lead to trash hauling to different sub-stations, (transfer stations) using a tractor-trailer.

sometimes, trash hauling in tractor-trailers can lead to OTR to another state's transfer station. there is money in garbage, you will work all the time, instead of sitting at truck stops, waiting on loads.

now once the divorce is settled and you get what you're supposed to get, then make that decison, to stay or go.

as the other have said, stop talking to the ex.

if you have to, talk to her THROUGH your attorney, as anything can be misconstrued.

and try to remember...

"once a cheater, always a cheater"....

trust was broken, and THAT can never be re-earned........

best of luck to you

 

Do what it takes to make some cash while you sort through the details. Like China said, keep the license clean.

Good luck with whatever road you choose..

 

I am inclined to go through with the trash hauling. J'Boro pays 15 something for cement ready mix but don't know if you are able to commute that far from up there.

I'll caution that shacking up is a bad thing You have apparently resolved a challenge against your home by someone who has showed to be less than faithful. She's gone. And you will bring in someone else to possibly endanger your home in the future?

I completely understand about nature etc. I would work on that carefully. If you like someone, that person has to be your equal or it wont work. I can only imagine some people have a oppertunity to possibly score a house through you in the future. Or something else.

Divorce needs to be taken care of. I am divorced myself and it's something we put behind us. But it's very uncommon in life as both of our sets of parents were divorced and remarried leading to interesting problems growing up. at least they stayed faithful to hearth and home where it's really important to do so for the kids. Why did we go through this? Student loans. For whatever reason the 30 year term on that kind of money became a real stressor or a proxy for other issues in the home. But that's paid off and we are a team as friends. You can chalk up the economic college bubble here in White county as a parasite. I think it was close to 50K in losses among others related directly to that.

The politicians talk about how the college will lift people up. However the debts to do it has destroyed us, our home and so forth. And we continue to watch figuratively 10,000 young people go in to college to learn how to be nurses for example when the Arkansas (Each Year) Nursing Bord has a fixed number of registured nurses in hospitals, some of which are closing.

I agree with dealing with ex through the lawyer. The kids, do what you can for them running trash at home. If you went OTR, this age group of the children are mighty tender and can maybe be damaged. I was, however I am the product of state raising via a school residental situation at that age. It would take me years to repair the damage what the State would prefer me to do rather than what I believed in. That trash might lead to bigger things at the cremation stations.

You are going to be ok. Just try the trash thing first. It's one constant in our society trash every day. However in order to be really ok, try to do whatever you can to avoid bringing in other people to your bed or theirs. Just yet. Remember that you are probably a prize or a goal of those less ethical and you might not see it in the moment.

At some point in the future if you have any relatonship with the children in spite of the divorce etc that is good for them they are going to want to have you in their life years later. I would not think of a greater reward for you than to hold the line so to speak and keep that love with the kids. In time or the right season you will be in a good position with them.

I remember one boy whose father courted my wife years ago and it was not a good situation. I took care of that problem and ultimately Life resolved it when he finally found someone to be a mother to his boy. But he died shortly after. At the time my spouse dealt with this situation with honor and there is no problem. But it could have been really bad. When I learned about that and did not do well taking care of that. High crimes are possible in situations like that. The boy? He was damaged. Took off for Hawaii. He probably will be on the beach for life. At least there he does not have to be reminded of the difficult life here.

The nature thing is itself not a problem. However I have a feeling from the availible programming and other productions that we live in a society that possibly is forsaking God and that would be a loss. Where we are here we have strong beliefs for a variety of things and to lose that and yourself and your home to be lost in turn in the future? Thta would be really bad. Be very careful who you pick into your life, you rae not a trophy or a prize to be passed around by those who see a form of gain to have something that is not theirs. I hope you follow me on this.

 

where will you b in 5 yrs running otr if you make it, where will be in 5 yrs if you drive a trash truck, if its the same then go with the trash truck. nobody says after 5 yrs of either if you manage your money well you have to do either, if you have money your not "sitting around truckstops waiting on a load" like many drivers will tell you. maybe at knight you would but after a yr find a better co. or buy a truck, or do whatever you want to do, but ya if you see yourself broke either way it isnt gonna matter what choice you make. now cue the guy who says money isnt everything and ask him how much he spends on his life, ive found the people who say that spend the most and have the least, if money wasnt everything then they would have plenty of it if they are workn so much. why they workn so much if money isnt everything? oh thats right they love what they do, ive found those people tend to play the lottery and hope to win, its just what people have been conditioned to say to make themselves feel better.

good luck