beating my head againist the wall

thanks guys and gal you all sound like you are giving me the best advice some people are being smart @$$es about it cause theyre tired of me because im bouncing around with my decision but i feel im doin my best. since i was talkin to a old fellow employee at gsi we were talkin about trucking and gettin into it and that nite i went home and but apps in and got calls from cre and swift. im gonna have to wait until after the holidays because of money reasons i dont want to go to the training with out any money or leave my family here with any money either. the other reason i think i may go to a college to get my cdl is because unemployment will pay for it i believe so im up in the air with it. im trying to be smart about it because like some have said its not a decision to take lightly. im not worried about passing the schoolin at all because im when i set my mind on something i put everything into it, hard work doesnt scare me at all. big equipment doesnt scare or worry me since i grow up on a farm so thats nothin new to me, i have always enjoyed driving tandems and pulling a 30 foot plus flat bed goose necks i love pulling trailers and hauling things on flat beds that way i choose flats when i get into this career so when someone says i dont have what it takes or im just looking for a job your wrong because the only thing that is bothering me is leaving my kids for the training because i know i problly wont be able to come home for a couple months but any dad would worry about that. and i dont want people saying this isnt the career for you then i would have to say that your wrong and dont want your negative attitude towards me i want the best postitive attiudes to help me thats why i came to this site.

 

sorry guys if i came across like a a-hole but this decision is for the best like truckerswife said this is really the only job out there that is hiring and making some kind of money. i know this is hard and a hard to be away from the wife and kids but dang what other jobs are left that dont lay off or anything? not very many really ive looked. this is one of my last thing i wanna do in life really ive always enjoyed driving tandems so i figured id enjoy truckin. i wanna do flats so i have stuff to do with the load and get out of the truck so im not sittin on my ace all day long. i know theres several places around my home town swift takes loads to and pick ups. again thanks guys and gal for your input. and truckerswife how does your husband cope being away from his baby. weve been thru all the kids firsts so thats out of the way and the most important, my fear is that my kids wont want anything to do with me when im comin and going all the time any help with this? me and my wife thought about gettin phone that have face time so i can see and talk to them every night, good idea?

 

ya i know they will want me when i come home, i just hate missing things that they will be doing, but seems like they always do things when im not here anyways and i miss it anyhow. i know i need this for myself as weel as for my family because really trucking is the only way to have a steady job in this world anymore. another thing i worry about is protecting thembut i think im gonna shove that problem very soon and that is im gonna go out and buy a couple nine mm one for me and one for the wife. the way people are these days is freakin crazy. im lookin forward to doin this career and cant wait but until then all i can do is worry about things thats just the dad and husband in me i guess