Help me survive another year OTR

I've since moved on from DHT. I got tired of a large portion of my pay being dependent on a bonus plan when much of their freight is border freight. I'd be stuck for a day or so waiting on krap to cross. Also, you aren't running the miles I do in a 66-68mph truck.

 

Also, DHTs average length of haul isn't 2500. It isn't coast to coast. And they do not and will not provide the amenities I have. So, if anybody wondering what company, just PM me. It isn't DHT.

 

I remember Chinatown. I think he posted some stuff back when I just started out and was looking for opportunities. All of which required me to move. I wasn't kidding when I said I lived in the middle of nowhere. Lol. We've formulated the exit plan. If I can survive this year and be debt free, we're going to buy a house and I'm out. She'll make enough to cover the mortgage and everything else, until I find something. I'm typically frugal on everything but my car. I love going to the track and racing, but no need for a racecar when I'm too tired or not home to enjoy it. It sits in my sister's garage 98% of the time. If I can't hold out, the car is gone. Just that and all the aftermarket extras I'd strip off would cover the car, and most of our other debt minus her astronomical amount of student loans. They'll be wiped clean once she makes so many payments and works for about 10 years in a qualified place. I'm trying to so some more of what I enjoy, especially next hometime. Even if I don't "feel like it." Loading the car up and heading to the track with my buddies. Hoping for a 10 second pass. Planning a cookout on July 4th with family and friends. Just 20ish more days.

 

My spirit is conflicted. Part of it says quit being a b**ch and do what you gotta do. The other part says F*** it, quit, you'll figure it out. Lol. This next hometime will probably decide a lot of my future.

 

Yeah, I know that's part of the problem. I've tried to calm down and take it easy, but I usually end up feeling guilty. I'm all or nothing for whatever reason. I'm just wired that way. On the exempt stuff, I don't go off the deep end crazy. I sleep plenty and drive until I'm tired. If I'm not making money, it's hard to justify being out here. If I was able to not feel guilty and bear myself up, I doubt I'd be in the mental state I am.

 

PM me. It isn't DHT lol.