Is this normal with a trainer?

Hi everyone, Im sorry for the long post but I have had such a questionable feeling about this and I was hoping to get opinions from people more experienced than myself as I am a total rookie. I recently got my CDL and have now started on with a mentor, but so far there are things that just feel like a red flag and I would like to know if my feelings are valid or if I need to just get over it and tough it out. Just want to preface this with I am still on my first few days with a mentor, so if I am way off the mark please let me know if Im casting judgements too early. I came in with the knowledge that I am the student and my mentor is the master and that I will be a guest on his truck. I respect that completely and have taken the role of whatever they say in this situation is law. Though I too have been a teacher to many pupils at different ages and levels for the last 18 years now and while the subject matter is different, teaching itself is a skill all on its own independent of subject and it is something I have been very successful at. I am not saying in the least I know more than my trainer because I know for a fact I do not, but I am questioning the method.

First there are things that are just fundamental: I am expecting to go over the road and wanted to get firsthand experience knowing what that is like and what to expect. My mentor is local, home daily and only does one or two runs a day that last 1.5 hours for the first and 6 hours for the second. So far we have done both of them a day and have been on duty for 11 hours a day the first day and 10 hours the second, only going as far as a state away, then I get to go home every day and have weekends off. I was hoping to get firsthand experience driving through rough terrain with a mentor guiding me eg. Mountains and inclement weather as well as what it is like to park at a truck stop, the etiquette and experience staying for the night but I worry I will not get any of this before being sent out on my own. I hate the idea of just figuring it out as I go, especially something as potentially dangerous as mountain driving.

Then there are other things that are sticking out as just potential safety hazards. I understand there are things I learned in school that are not as applicable to the real world and because of driver behavior will have to adjust to the real world, but some of it just doesn’t sit right. Here’s what ive experience so far:

-Pre trip: I understand pre trips on the road might not always be as extensive as what we learned to get our CDL, but I figured they would still be done. Day one there wasn’t even a mention of it when hooking and unhooking to different trailers and taking off. Day two, first thing in the morning my mentor asked me if I remembered how to perform a pretrip. I said yes and asked if we were going to. He said very sarcastically “you can if you want to but im going to sit in here and wait for this timer to be done so we can leave.” He doesn’t do pretrips and just uses those 15 mins to scroll on his phone.

-The very first thing he said to me when I got on his truck was “whatever you learned in school, its all wrong and we are going to do the opposite because it doesn’t apply to the real world.” Again, I know there are things we learned in school that don’t work in the real world the way that was stated to us, but any mention of school, what we learned or saying/doing anything that even hints at something we learned at school aggravates this person. Just one example of many was me moving over from the right lane when a vehicle with flashing yellow lights was on the shoulder helping another disabled vehicle. His response to that was “ why’d you move over? Let me guess, it was something they taught you in school” in a very annoyed tone. From then on ,I was told not to move over or slow down unless it was a cop because a cop will pull us over. I didn’t even bring up CDL school or if it was something we learned, I just always thought it was something we had to do even in our regular cars.

- When backing and parking a trailer: I was told not to look back at what the trailer is doing, just focus on him giving me directions. There are times when Im backing that he stands in front of the tractor and instead of wanting me to look at what the trailer behind me is doing or how it is moving and responding to what I do with the steering wheel, Im told I need to focus on him and just doing what he tells me to do. I get that I need a spotter right now, and I trust that, but I worry if I never even look back to see whats going on behind me then Ill never learn how to actually move and park a trailer. It seems hes just teaching me how to listen to him, not how to maneuver trailers into position when hes telling me, literally, to stop looking at the trailer and just focus on him. Then in the process confuses his own left and right, and gets mad at me for following the direction he gave me and not “knowing what he meant.”

Then there are other things that just make no sense: when we pull into a terminal or yard 3 times now hes gotten mad that I went too far past the place he wanted me to park, or past the trailer we were suppose to pick up, yet never once pointed to the spot or trailer we were aiming for. All Ive gotten has been “Go that way” then a very loud annoyed sigh a short while later and “ I wanted you to park back there.” Im obviously not a mind reader and wouldn’t know that if he doesn’t tell me before I get to the sport or trailer, but it is apparently my mistake when I pass it.

When I make a right turn, Im told I need to look at the mirror to make sure I pass the curb or anything on that side so I know when to start moving back in from the outside, I agree with this 100%, the problem is he leans so far forward to look in the mirror from the passenger side while I turn that he blocks it and all I see is his backside and the back of his head. Then I get an angry “cut in already.” I brought it up to him and told him he is blocking my view and all he said was I just wasn’t looking.

Whenever I am driving, my mentor is on one of his two phones scrolling, texting or talking on them. So far almost 100% of the time. The first time we took off on the road he told me he would be on his phone, but that he’ll still be watching, somehow. I have been driving 100% of the time I have been with this mentor and when I have a question while driving or a situation pops up that I would like advice on I get a nice display of theatrics first: a heavy annoyed sigh, him exaggerating pausing whatever video he is watching, takes his headphones out then a short “what did you say?” It really feels like I am out there driving alone already and that I cant approach him with anything.

Another situation we ran in to was on a road with a 25 mph speed limit. I was already going 28 and he was telling me to go faster. I told him I don’t think I should and pointed out the speed limit sign and told him I was already going over it. He got annoyed that I questioned what he told me to do and said “Really? The speed limit sign is what youre going to tell me when I drive this road every day?”

My last questionable thing I was told, I think I see the merit to it: when youre on a road that merges together like an onramp or when cars are trying to move into your lane, don’t slow down to avoid them, its up to them to avoid you because youre going to wreck the trailer.” I get that as a tractor/trailer its much harder for us to maneuver around vehicles and dodge on a whim, so I can see why he would say that, but I think the reason I was given, might be a little off. I also don’t want to cause an accident or lose my job/license before I even get started.

I can tell he is not very fond of me, getting annoyed when I ask questions, expecting me to know the answer to something he hasn’t shown me yet and I didn’t learn in school. I was told verbatim that I am horrible at backing, which if its true I don’t mind hearing because its something I need to work on, but I have been only following his direction, so if its wrong then that really reflects on what I am told to do. Either way, I don’t need him to like me and that is no issue at all, I am just trying to get past this and move out on my own but I cant tell if this is normal or if my thoughts of this being off are valid. I am willing to just tough it out, and I am not one to cause arguments, but I worry I will not learn what I need before going out on my own, and if the childish reactions continue then there will be a point where I wont be able to just grin and bear it anymore, and I don’t want that to cause awkward abrasion for the month I am with my mentor.