Not that new driver just a new experience

Discussion in 'Driver Health' started by timidlady, Feb 27, 2020.

  1. timidlady

    timidlady Light Load Member

    Sep 25, 2018
    Been driving a year now.

    How do you cope with distressing news when you are on the road? I guess I never thought much about it. I’m going to urgent care tomorrow because I’m pretty sure I have cancer. I don’t know what else it could possibly be. I have a sudden unusual growth that’s bleeding. The worst part is going to be telling my dad. I dont think there would be anything harder to tell my dad ever. Not even being pregnant at 15. Two of my brothers have died from cancer. I know how I would feel if kid three told me about cancer. I’d be devastated. At times I’d wonder why it wasn’t time for me to die myself. I don’t even want to tell him when I’m diagnosed. If it’s not going to kill me or seriously impair me I probably won’t tell him even though we are close. Maybe I’m jumping the gun a bit but there’s almost no way this could be anything else but serious. So I’ve been doing my fair share of crying in this stupid nowhere truck stop with no place for medical place for me to be seen to either laugh at myself or cry (most likely cry really hard a whole lot). But that’s not the only scary stuff. I visited my grandmother and she kept calling me someone else’s name and could barely open her eyes. It’s almost time I think.

    So what’s the best way to cope with scary or sad news on the road all alone? I’m feeling pretty distressed tonight. Not going to get much sleep but at least I’m on my way to the company terminal so I can sit for a bit, find medical care and maybe get some shallow sleep while I wait for my cancer verdict. I can’t even watch tv really because I cried my contacts out and I’m not feeling it about looking for my glasses. Just nose to the phone.

    If I have cancer (99% certain I do) my new boyfriend will probably die believing in God (he’s a cancer survivor) and my dad will probably die hating Him. Cancer would not effect my faith views since I was born with cerebral palsy. This is the same on a spiritual view for myself. Just the same old fighting the losing battle of the inevitable deterioration of my flesh body. You win some. You lose always.
    truckdriver31 Thanks this.
  2. kemosabi49

    kemosabi49 Trucker Forum STAFF Staff Member

    Jan 13, 2013
    SW Arkansas
    I sincerely hope you do not have cancer. Especially with the defeatist attitude you seem to have going in. Your mind can do wonders in fighting sickness. Change your attitude, if you can.
    Again I hope this is going to just be a scare for you. I'll be pulling for you.
  3. Oor

    Oor Road Train Member

    Jan 11, 2012
    Call a good friend and talk. Then you're not alone.
  4. Odin's Rabid Dog

    Odin's Rabid Dog Heavy Load Member

    May 6, 2018
    NW MT
    Does your company have an EAP (employee action plan)? Those have counselors available over the phone.
    MOBee, truckdriver31 and CrappieJunkie Thank this.
  5. D.Tibbitt

    D.Tibbitt Road Train Member

    Apr 26, 2013
    Our buddy @Lepton1 is fighting cancer as well and it took him off the road . I hope u can surround urself with good people with positive attitudes , and put up ur best fight against it. We are all pulling for u here
  6. Numb

    Numb Crusty Curmudgeon

    Jan 30, 2012
    it could be a boil, a cyst, all kinds of things OTHER than cancer.

    take a deep breath and go have it checked out.
  7. theSoz

    theSoz Light Load Member

    Jan 24, 2020
    First and foremost, take a deep breath and try to calm down. As a former medical professional, let me assure you that an "unusual growth that’s bleeding" can literally be a thousand different things. I understand that you have a family history of cancer, and while that may put you at a higher risk, cancer itself is not hereditary. The best thing you can do is to think positively and go see a doctor. Remember, whatever this is, it can be anything or nothing at all. Getting all upset about it, isn't going to change a thing, so don't stress, schedule an appointment with a doctor.
  8. jammer910Z

    jammer910Z Road Train Member

    May 28, 2015
    You don't KNOW, until you know.

    IF it does come back as positive, then you need to get in a mindset of positivity and do EXACTLY what they tell you to do.

    Procrastination, and a Defeatist attitude... which you would have to admit you do have if you were to read all of your previous posts again now... will do you no favors.

    We might all be a tough nut out here and call each other out for BS, but YOU ARE ONE OF US, and we are on your team!

    Go to the doctor... let us know that its negative.

    If it's not, BEAT IT
  9. "semi" retired

    "semi" retired Road Train Member

    Apr 16, 2014
    high plains colorado
    I'm not sure what to make of you. You post threads on how bad this is, or who can we blame for that, now this. I think it's odd, we hardly know you, yet you turn to us for clearly a non-trucking issue. I don't mean to be insensitive, but I think there are better places to discuss your health problems. This is family stuff, no matter how devastating the news may be. Everybody has health problems. If you don't now, you will. I'm the biggest baby when it comes to health, and at 65, I have a lot of BS ahead of me, but this goes up and above our training as truck drivers. Good luck.
  10. Ridgeline

    Ridgeline Road Train Member

    Dec 18, 2011
    Omg ... op get a grip.

    My wife had something similar ten years ago, it turned out to be an impacted boil that was pea size but by the time we got to the er in an hour it was the size of a golf ball and growing. It bleed a lot.

    They rushed her into emergency surgery to remove it, then after the biopsy report came back her doc said they don't know what it was but it wasn't cancer.

    So relax, go home and go to your own doc. Urgent care isn't for cancer, just cuts and bruises.
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