Where is everyone #5

My Anal Glaucoma kicked in this mornin... I gotta go out n prime the tail tank for the sprint car in a bit... one more week till racin season! Whoop!

 

And I've gotta make 2 runs to Massillon. T/T is here, and I'm lazy. Aughhh...to be beckoned to work, when the fireplace calls my name. The nerve of this world, eh?

 

Red was riding through the desert on his way into El Paso. He had been on the trail for a while and thought he'd stop in at a creek and cool himself and his horse off for a bit. He noticed an Indian sitting on a big rock taking a break. Red struck up a little convo with the Indian about the local hunting and trading routes. They chatted it up and the Cowboy got ready to get back on the trail and wanted to know what time it was. He asked the Indian. The Indian laid down on his back with an erect #####, and said "Look Cowboy, I make Sundial. Time is 10 O'Clock. Red replied with a big thanks and went on his way.

A few hours later he came across another watering hole. To his amazement there was an Indian there also. Red kicked off his boots and relaxed and cooled his horse off for a bit. Same question came about. "Look Cowboy, I make sundial, Time is 2 o'clock" said the Indian. Red went on about his business and got back on the trail into El Paso.

Red came up on another watering hole a few hours later. This time something was a bit different. He saw an Indian over in the bushes just going to town with his hand, up and down, up and down, stroking very hard. Red was amazed at what he saw. He asked the Indian, "Just what in the hell are you doing there friend?" The Indian replied "Not much Cowboy, just winding my watch."

 

Ummmm it wasn’t worth it... kids favorite was the fruity pebbles as well @Humblepie i didn’t even try it fruity pebbles are gross to me. #### funny colors after eating them, tells you something right there. I’m w you @Oxbow

 

A cowboy riding through the desert passed a dead horse.

A little while later, he saw an old Indian man walking.

He asked the Indian if he could help him and the Indian said
"Yes, my horse died back there and I could use a ride back to my tribe."

So the cowboy said he would and rode the old Indian man back to his tribe.
When they arrived, the Indian man told the chief what the cowboy had done for him; and the Chief said "Because you were so kind, I would like to give you something. Is there something that you would like?"

The cowboy thought a minute and said, "well I have not been with a woman in quite a while"....

The Indian Chief said he could help him with that and brought him to a particular little teepee.

The chief went in for a moment and came back out and told the cowboy the Indian woman was ready for him.

So the cowboy went in and mounted up so to speak. The squaw started screaming Wahoo, Wahoo!"

This excited the cowboy so he thrust harder and harder.
She screamed louder and louder "WAHOO, WAHOO!!!"
The cowboy sprung his load and got dressed and walked out of the teepee.

The old Indian Chief was standing outside and the cowboy told him
"I think she enjoyed it as much as I did because she kept screaming 'wahoo, wahoo.'
What does that mean in Indian? the cowboy asked the old Chief.

The Indian Chief replied "WRONG HOLE, WRONG HOLE! You Idiot!"

 

So.. THAT's where the sundial came from.. 'figgered you'd know, pard~!!!

 

Yep, Lucky Charms beer.. HE'S HOLE'ding out, GUYS~!!!! TOLD YA~!!!!!!

 

Last one...lol


Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?"


"Yeah," says the other cowboy.


"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."


Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "Hmm. About two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, many chests and trunks in wagon."


"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing! Indian, how do you know that?"


The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me half hour ago."

 

Then you probably won't like @Grubby 's Lucky Charms beer, LoL~! Those donuts looked awesome, tbh. I like cappucino/mocha ones; looks like you had some.

 

Sounds like the Amish up my road..they always get in my way OTW home w/ the truck.....I buffed 'er right out....




KIDDING... was a deer.. just a little one.