Attention All Drivers(and steering wheel holders)...

I once backed a swift Wal-Mart dedicated truck into the docks at the store I used to work at. No joke here. She just couldn't get it in despite all 4 docks being empty.

 

A swift driver is walking through a Petro parking lot one day. He happens across a driver who has one of those green Stanley thermoses. Swift asked, "Hey what's that for?" The driver says: "It keeps my hot stuff hot and my cold stuff cold." Swift says "Man I gotta get one of them there thermoses." and he runs off into the travel store. As Swift is leaving the truck stop another Swift driver sees the green thermos and ask's what it is. The first Swift driver says "ah man, this is my new thermos. It keeps hot stuff hot and cold stuff cold." The second Swift driver says: "Hey that's really something. What have you got in your thermos right now?"
The first Swift driver says: "At the moment, I've got two cups of coffee and an orange popsicle for later..."

 

ok, i will admit it, i laughed

 

and y'all wonder why those swift drivers are bitter? lolllll....

 

because they drive for swift???

 

At 62 mph, who wouldn't be bitter? "Attention Pilot customers: Swift transportation, party of three, your shower is ready."

 

How do you know your wife's seeing a Swift driver?

You get home a week later and he's STILL trying to back out of the driveway.

 

Now showing: On Golden Pond II

 

Whys is it good to drive near a Schnieder truck during a blizzard?

'cause when the helicopters come out after the storm looking for survivors, that big orange cone will be the first thing they see.

 

I park at the fuel island.