Cant Cure Stupidity

This story is lengthy, but you have to read the whole thing to understand where I come from with the above title.
I haul custom chemicals and for the most part, wht I haul is flammable or flammable combustible.
Anyhow, I picked up a load of beta-pinine in J-ville Fl destined for Memphis Ten. The consignee is a new plant that makes the likes of shampoos, soaps, and an aray of cleaning agents. I stopped in Olive Branch Mississipi at the Fly'n Hook to call for directions. My call was directed to the recieving department.

I asked the young lady who took the call, "How do I get there?"
After a few seconds of silence she replies, " I dunno."
"Don't you travel to work?"
"No I ride with someone"
"Can I talk to them?"
"He's not here today."

Like I said, it can't be cured.

"May I please talk to somebody who knows how to get there?"

I finally get directions to the plant and made my appointment time with time to spare. I checked in at the recieving office, and the girl took my paper work and asked what I had.
"Bulk liquid load of beta-pinine."
"Ok. Back into door number 4."
"Are we drumming it off into barrels?"
"No we'll use a fork lift."
"I don't think your forklift operator will like that."
"Why not?"
"Because he'll drown."

She looked confused, so I pointed out the highlighted bold print "1 TANK LOAD OF BETA PININE"

"What does that mean?" She asks.
"I have a tanker."

She finally makes a couple of calls and directs me to go to the other end of the plant and someone will meet me out there.
I gown there and a young man meets me by the tank farm.

The first thing he says is, "I don't know wich tank it goes in."
"Can you find someone who does?"

25 minutes later, 2 other guys come out and point out the coupling they think I am suppose to unload in. I told them they better be sure.

Another 30 minutes later...they're sure.

I had to stretch out 8o ft of hose to get to their pump. After I hooked up, and opened my valves they proceeded to prime their pump. As they purged the air out, beta-pinine would come out of the ball valve. Finally, after 15 minutes of purging, and about 20 gallons of pinine, we're unloading.

I got back in my truck to call my dispatcher in Jax to let them know of the situation. As I am talking to my dispatcher, I look in my mirror and see this guy smoking a cigarette while standing in a lake of pinine inside the tankfarm.

I told my dispatcher, "I gotta go!"
and promptly exited the truck.

I walked to the back of my tank and said," I'm gonna un-hook and park my truck across the street."
He asked," Why?"
I pointed at the flammable placard on my tank and asked, "Do you think it's a good idea to be smoking?"
He looks down at his feet, realizes what he's standing in and replies, "Think I should move?"

I often meet people and wonder how they have lived as long as they have. But I found an entire company that employs these people.

See yall in the funny papers