Wife of a trucker, I need help!!! from you guys on the road.

Hello,

Your dilemma is a dependency on a set income and this income is difficult to achieve if your husband changes from an OTR position to a local position. Bottom line, you have two options that will resolve your issue. 1. Find a local job that pays the same. 2. Cut your spending.

I have a STRONG recommendation for your family. Forgive me, but I feel compelled to use dieting as an analogy. A lot of folks believe the best way to lose weight is to join a gym and walk/run the pounds off on a treadmill. This is false. Exercise is the most inefficient way to lose weight. What is the most efficient? Do not consume unessential calories/carbohydrates/fats to begin with. The same goes for your finances. The most efficient way to eliminate debt is to not create debt. Both of these are very difficult for most families. But, here are a couple of tips that will assist you in life. They involve the two most expensive, arguably, purchases most families face: an automobile and a home.

1. Always, pay yourself first. I don't care if you only put one penny in the savings account every week. DO IT! Of course, 10% (or more) of your net earnings is preferable. Here is a simple way to save over a thousand dollars a year. Put a dollar for each week of the year into your savings account. One dollar for week one, two dollars for week two, three dollars for week three, etc... until the last week of the year where you will put in fifty two dollars.

2. If you must purchase a car on credit (most people do), do it. Here's a tip to avoid ever having to pay with credit (aka creating debt) a second time. Purchase the auto with the mindset that you will keep it for at least twice as long as you finance it for. If you plan to finance it for five years, then plan to keep it for 10 years. Once the auto is paid for, keep making the payment, only now make that payment to your savings account. At the ten your mark, you will have an auto with 120k-150k miles that is paid for, AND enough money to essentially pay cash for another auto when the time comes. Never stop making that car payment to yourself.

3. You say you just purchased a home for $83k. I'm guessing you obtained a 30 year mortgage. You will put a smile on my face if you say you financed for 15. Either way, do your absolute best to make an extra payment a year. On a 30 year mortgage you will cut your mortgage to approximately 22-23 years by following this advice. This will accomplish two goals that your family should have. 1. It will save you thousands in interest. 2. It will eliminate debt more quickly.

These are just a few examples of ways to eliminate what I, being realistic, consider necessary debt that a young family will face as well as help you grow your nest egg. Of course, like I said earlier, the best way to eliminate debt is to not create it to begin with. Thus, do your best to avoid the temptation of using credit to purchase things you may desire, but do not need; thus, creating unnecessary debt. I tell you all of this for one purpose. I hope you see it now. The best way for you and your husband to accomplish your goals is for you to put yourself into a financial position to make them happen in lieu of placing yourself in a position to where debt dictates your life choices.

Best of luck to both of you!

 

Well honestly, my wife and I, have worked out that when I get home, I get one day to myself, to unwind from the road, which helps a lot. We have a date night. ( have to plan on a sitter since you kids are so young. We did this when our 2 girls were small). To this day if I get within 150 miles of the house, she will come meet me, with or without the kids. ( my kids are 17 and 20 now) and they still come.
As for being screwed over, unfortunately it's pretty rampant in the industry. Just stay strong and keep a eye out for bigger and better opportunities.
I've been OTR 27 years and still married to the same amazing woman, just celebrated 22 years with her.
Your husbands time will come eventually, the right job, the right pay with good home time. Tell him to stick to his guns with whatever company he works for, and not to take any BS from them.
Best advice I can give is " Family is always 1st no matter what! Job is 2nd"
Hope this helps you some.

 

When he gets home and after the kids are asleep, the same thing any man wants. Bed him well. After a good nights sleep, bed him again. Then make him a wonderful breakfast. Just my opinion, but when I was gone for a while, that's what I wanted.

 

as my marriage matured, I personally put less stress, pressure and insistence on our bedroom time. I try to concentrate on 'us' time(as in shopping or watching a movie or working on various outside projects together). We both have busy lives, so I do my level best to avoid interrupting my wife's regular routine...our body clocks are on different time zone's...I am an 'early to bed, early to rise' person, my wife is a night owl. I am up, dressed and ready for my day, coffee made, breakfast eaten waiting for the sun to rise (and I often make breakfast myself...a bowl of cereal is easy for a non-cooker like me). Often times I have already begun working on whatever project I planned to do before she even wakes up. I don't even bring in my dirty work clothes until my wife is at work, that way she doesn't feel obligated to do them(she only works 'outside' the house Thursdays and the 1st Saturday of each month)...maybe because I am middle aged and in a very happy marriage, bedroom time isn't highest on either one of our priority lists...it's there, but we don't get upset if we aren't having relations all that often.

 

Is 'Facetime' strictly an IPhone/Apple program or can any device/phone use it?

 

There are other apps like Tango. But I use my iphone and ipad

 

I think it's pretty normal for a trucker with young kids to get out of sorts around Christmas time. For me it came with wanting to be there more than I was. It usually will pass pretty soon. Now that my kids are mostly grown (my youngest is 16 oldest is 21) I miss the days of coming up the drive in my old Pete with both of them jumping up and down screaming Daddies home. It sounds like your doing a jam up job so just keep doing what your doing would be my advice.

 

He should get all the endorsements and go for hazmat/tankers;then no more money problems.
If not tankers, then go with Maverick and be home every weekend and make a thousand a week; same with TMC.

 

We use Line to video chat with each other.

 

2nd on the half hr nap together. Holding my woman just laying there was the best part of my week when I stayed out. And I always made sure to say it to her. She's the reason I've changed how I operate: so I am home more and around to be there. I realize that's not an option for everyone. Just saying that being together is the most important thing in making us both happy: regardless of where and what we are doing.