Divorce-Child Visitation in Truck

*gives you a big 'ol hug*

Okay....when my grandson turns 12 I'll be taking him with me. (nextNov.)

Sheets are washed by the drivers. So...the Dad could make sure the sheets are clean. OR if Mom wanted to she could send their own sheets or a bed roll. Just like if they were going camping. If it's the location...then Dad can find another place to park. Or maybe Mom could say "hey! Look we were married and we've got these beautiful daughters together so how about YOU stay here at MY place and that night I'll go spend the night with my dear friend. There is no reason for us not to work together so our kids have two great parents".


Look....Mom has a tough road just like Dad does. It is HARD to raise kids and it's made even harder with a divorce. Hearts are wounded....tempers hot......BUT Mom has a big problem right now. She is about to possibly get labled by Dad and her daughters and blamed for not allowing them to stay with Dad. She doesn't want that......and I'm sure she absolutely doesn't deserve it. But it's going to happen if she takes a stand on every issue.

Please don't think I'm picking on Mom because my heart breaks for her. Maybe she could find a place she thinks is safer? She could say "hey! I want this to work so here's their sleeping bags, and I found this really nice W-Mart that'll let you park there! I feel much better about the W-M parking lot than the convenience store so take the girls and have fun!"

She'll be the hero.

She was married to this man.....had 4 daughters with him....she probably knows that he'd lay down his life for those girls. So.............with a bit of thought she'll remember she can trust him with them. He'll walk the girls to the rest room, he'll lock the truck, he'll watch over his babies like the father he is and it'll be okay.

The girls will come home tired, need a shower and they'll know their Mom bent over backwards so they could be with their Dad.

That knowledge will matter to her girls for the rest of their lives.

I'll share something personal. I'm married to a wonderful man who had two daughters with his first wife. When I fell in love with him one of the reasons was because of his great love for his daughters. In fact before we married I insisted he consider another attempt of reconciliation with his ex wife for their daughters' sake. The first thing we did each month was pay child support and any additional needs those girls had. We might eat beanie weanie but by golly those girls' needs were met. I loved him for that. I loved him because he tried everything possible to see them. For almost 10 years I watched as the ex wife broke every promise of visitation. I watched as she hid them out of state from him. I watched his heart break over and over as this woman denied him his children and denied those girls their Daddy.

I got the calls as she sunk into a life of mental illness. I got the calls when she would be arrested for prostitution, (yeah she was a real winner) I got the calls when Mass state was going to take the girls into foster care but wouldn't give them to their Daddy yet wanted us to pay the state the child support. I got the calls when the oldest girl got pregnant at 13, married at 14. I got the calls from the ex wife when she wanted more child support because she kept having other men's babies.

And yet......not once in almost 10 years did he get to lay eyes on his daughters.

We legally kidnapped the younger girl when she was 14. She's my daughter now and has been for 20 years. She has scars on her back from beatings from her mother. But worse than that she and her sister have scars on their hearts.

They both hate their biological mother and the primary reason is they learned how much their mother robbed them of by denying them their father. We've never said bad things about their mother. (oh Lord how I sometimes wanted to!) but they do. They resent her for them not having a Daddy and the day she died they felt no loss only release. They wouldn't even attend her funeral. It absolutely broke my heart.

I've watched my own sister do almost the same thing to her daughters. They resent her for not allowing them to see their father.

I've watched my brothers' ex wifes try to do it too. Their kids moved out and went to live with my brothers when reaching the age that Texas allows kids to voice an oppinion to the courts. It was crushing to thier moms. I hated seeing it happen...I love my ex sisters in laws.

And I've watched people overcome their pain, their anger and work together to make it possible for children to have BOTH parents.

There are much bigger issues than sleeping in a bunk in a truck......and I hope that Mom will save her battles for those bigger issues.

Please know that I hope the very VERY best for all six in this family.

 

The next time that I run across someone who thinks that truck drivers are nothing more than knuckle dragging mouth-breathing neanderthals, I'm gonna invite them in here to read some of the posts that Nana and Aftershock et al have made...

 

ahhh to be divorced and deal with these issues....It's not easy for either parent. I do have to agree on some points here but I'm not gonna quote for now. I am so glad this father wants to see his kids. There are too many absent parent out there who do not see their children at all and that saddens me because I am in that situation with my 3 kids, but they have an awesome step-dad who also drives truck and I am able to go with him at times and my parents keep them since they are teenagers and very independent.

I honestly think the RV park is an awesome idea..the downside is, correct me if Im wrong cus not sure where they live, winter where else but a hotel?

I know that hotels can be pricey and I don't know what the dad pays in support but sometimes that is something that cannot be afforded all the time. Does the truck have 2 bunks? I know a dad who makes a bed out of the 2 front seats and his kids sleep in the bunk area..Not sure if it's legal, but have seen it done. As far as being in the truck it is a learning experience, it shows what kind of daily things we take for granted, so visitation in the truck can also be viewed as a learning experience as well.

 

Honestly, if the ex isnt questioning the fathers integrity, whats wrong with the kids sleeping in the truck with him? Thats why i brought it up. That's all. I knew that no one on this thread was questioning his integrity.

And I can assume that theres a reason they're exes. Someone questions someone's something.

The comments i made are also an in general complaint about how sex basically runs the world.
It aint like im homeless. LOL. The race car is after i buy a house

 

You do but how are they going to check up on that?

I live with my parents as i said earlier, but how can it be proven? I've been in this truck for 4 weeks without even being within 100 miles of home (totally unusual for me). I on average stay in the truck far more often than the physical address.....


EVERYONE knows SOMEONE with an address......

the secretary of state (DMV) in michigan wants you to prove the address is yours with a bill. big deal. You can get the bill sent anywhere.

 

Are you interested in obtaining a street legal race car type vehicle, or an all-out competition race car that isn't streetable?? What style of racing do you like?
Do you follow NASCAR?

Whereas it may be possible to get a bill sent anywhere, I'm thinkin' the Secretary of State (DMV) wants a current utility bill in your name and at the address you claim as home.

I ran into a similar situation several months ago when I wanted a library card in the town where I have lived for over 20 years. At the moment, I'm renting a room in house owned by someone else while I search for a house to purchase. None of the utilities are in my name. There's no reason for my name to be on them.

I asked how they'd suggest I obtain the proof required to receive a security clearance high enough to allow me to check a book out of the library. Their suggestion surprised me.
I was told to just address a letter to myself at the address where I claim to be living and drop it in the mailbox so it'll have a post mark proving the letter went through the post office and was delivered to me.

I told them if they knew me like I know me, they'd be aware that whenever I write letters to myself, I seldom open and read any of them, :smt069l -- and I'm so rude that I never reply to myself or even acknowledge that I received them. Adding, --- truth be knowed, I don't really like me and would prefer not to associate with myself. Actually I'd prefer not to be anywhere near where ever I am for fear someone might connect the dots and come to the conclusion that I hang out with myself and condone the outlandish things that I get into.
I mean, I do have a reputation to protect and an image to consider. The last thing I need is for me to lower myself to my own standards.

Normally, I'm a nice guy, ------->
But when necessary, I morph into a
baaadd man -------> In a good way,
of course.

Unless I receive mail from me and have to kick my buttox, ...... again, .......
to convince me that I think I'm a jerk :smt075:smt062:smt037

 

I myself when I see my kids on my time off I get a motel in joplin its a bigger town rent a car and gets me out of the truck.I will agreeith the one driver if he is just starting out probably is not making much may not be able to afford a motel ans all but at least the guy is not some deadbeat that don't want to see them. And yes a lot of drivers who are single live out of the truck some keep things at relatives no point I guess being single to buy a house when your off a few days a month

 

You're going to derail this withe the race car thing, LOL.
I was going to make a street legal (barely) drag car. The whole having a tractor/trailer to haul it with thing was just an excuse to have a non-commercial semi, LOL. i'd love to do that though!

I don't follow any racing, i used to but my dad ruined it by being a jerk when i was trying to watch it! still interestd though. Recovered about 4 hours every sunday by not watching it LOL. I used to follow NHRA. Even watched a driver die on TV (surprised they showed it at all, honestly..)


As for the bills, i dont remember what i used here in michigan. When I got my license, i already had my ID and I remember it was a lot easier to get an id or license back then (i was 17, parents couldnt afford drivers ed)

As far as your library card, i dont know why you didnt realize that. LOL.

Now, michigan has this thing called a michicard...its a library card you can use in any michicard participating library in all of michigan. It was cool when I lived in the boonies, i could go to the big libraries in nearby towns. We had a small library smaller than the house i live in!

...but some libraries had ridiculous requirements to get a card (but once you had one you were into alllll the libraries). Watervliet is in the boonies and a little hick town, their library just wanted to see my ID (with my address on it). Good enough! Funny thing is they have the nerve to charge people $20 for a library card if they dont live there. The hell?

Benton Harbor was ghetto and wanted something within the last month with your address and name on it. Didnt have to be mail but had to be real recent. I used a voters registration RECEIPT, lol. Library is in the middle of the ghetto. If it was a bigger city people would be selling crack right in front of it like they do in the bronx.