My first load 52 years ago. Trucking ain't the same, but has really changed

I take all the Prayers i can get. Even this moment feel bad. Im off that Oxycodone crap, but now the pain wont go away, and from what i here it takes a week to leave your system. I just want my life back. thanks buddy

 

Ever see the 13th Warrior?

Today was a good day.

 

No, I have not

 

Thank you very much jbatmick, I am feeling a little better. Last week ended up in ER, I lost my freakin mind, so they contacted my primary DOC, i saw him at 1:30 pm. I broke down and told him i cant do this any more. I mean i really broke down. He put me on a new med, WELL, i lost it again, the side effects, Severe Depression Severe Anxiety. After 2 days, i stopped taking it, and said "LORD, Please help me, PLEASE".I would get in my car and at 2:00 am till 3:30 am sit in a parking lot, Mcdonalds, Grocery store, Lake Front. And then go home. NO SLEEP. cant Sleep. After going off ALL meds, for a week, Last Night i actually slept from 10:00 pm till 3;30am. I was not told i would be going through all this turmoil before they did the surgery. I HAVE zero tolerance for pain. Thats my problem. this coming thursday will be 6 weeks. this is the WORST thing i have ever done. Wish i could go back in time, and not have done this. No matter how i would lay in bed, if the wound cut would touch something it set off fireworks in my brain. what little brain i have left after all this. sorry for the long post guys, very difficult for me, even though i know im weak. Thanks