A Good Marriage

1st Rule: Marriage comes 1st. Period. End of story. The rest will fall into place.

 

As long as you have discussed it together, and have a true understanding of what you are both getting into, it should work just fine. The half at home will have to learn how to deal with things on their own, including home repairs and maintenance. I have been on both sides of that equation.

 

I did just fine because we had some practice from the military. I would suggest that when you are home that you take care of all the little things that need to be done that you would normally do. Your wife most likely does not want to take the car/truck into the shop for oil changes. Any items on your honey-due list try to get them done before you set out on the road. The idea is to relieve your wife of any stress that is going to pile up especially if you have kids. Make sure she has all the authority on any accounts that you have that she may need to pay the bills. It's going to be different for her (and hard) because she will be taking on the responsibilities of two people.

While you're on the road keep in contact with her all you can. However, explain to her before you leave that there might be occasions that you can not call. So don't set an hour every night that you'll be calling. You don't want her to worry about you out on the road and if you miss a time your were going to call her. But try to call as often as you can. Whatever you do, do not tell her about any accidents you have seen or any of the problems you might be having unless you're just venting to her. If you do vent just remember she's going to wonder about you and the truck.

When you get home try to explain that you need a day to unwind. Then after that she needs a day too. Set up a surprise for her like some time at a spa or getting her hair done. Anything you know will be a treat to her and give it as a surprise with the thanks of taking care of the homefront while you were gone. Make her feel she has a very important job at home, which she does.

 

I am aware of a couple of situations where it appears that OTR is the only thing that keeps the marriage going. In both cases, they are long time married, and he is a long time trucker. In both cases they are usually in phone contact at least once a day, and things seem to work out great.

Until the guys get home time. Then is when the problems manifest themselves.

From what I see, from the outside looking is, is that we have four people here who are all pretty much self centered, and care more for themselves than they do their mates. I would be willing to bet that these marriages would have been on the rocks years ago, if the guys had "normal" jobs where they were home every night.

It just seems that every situation is different. You can make your marriage work when you are OTR. But it takes courage, dedication, respect, love and communication to do it. Not necessarily in that order.

 

Sometimes it helps, maybe your other half might want you gone lol

 

Make sure that when you are home, you also spend quality time together, even if it is just watching a favorite movie together or something like that. It will take a bit of time for you two to get things figured out, but it will come together. Remember to have patience at first. Maybe get her to join up here, as there are a lot of trucker's wives here that can help her figure out how to deal with you being gone so much. We are a great support network for the significant others . . . male or female!

 

What about a hubby who won'teven call you becasue he is afraid he'll cry on the phone and his trainer will hear him? He said no privacy in the truck. We can't even talk out our problems.

 

Maybe you should look into a company that wont keep you out for 4-6 weeks at a time