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convincing wife

Discussion in 'Questions From New Drivers' started by sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011.

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  1. Jan 3, 2011 #1
    sjbr549

    sjbr549 Bobtail Member

    23
    1
    Dec 5, 2010
    mount airy,nc
    0
    need advice on my wife. she always sees things in the negative light. always gloom and doom never the brighter side. her work is about to close she's been saying that for 5yrs now. this time i'm pretty sure it won't last another year maybe two. they've been on 4day weeks almost 2yrs talking about 3day weeks after the holiday vaction is over. i have a decent job 15min drive from our house. my work is slowing down too but i still get 40hrs. she works 1st shift and i work 2nd shift. we see each other only on weekends. the thing is i use to work underground construction gone 2 to 3weeks at a time. i talked to her about going otr everything was cool i thought. i started talking to a couple of companies to get a feel for my options.1 outfit told me to put in an app.so i did. ever since i told her i did that, it's like i killed someone or don't love her. the first thing she said was i'll never be home or make any money and been in a pissy mood ever since. i have'nt quit my job and have'nt been offered or accepted any other job. i've tried to reason with her to no avail. told her if she loses her job and draw 150 week un-employment and my 275 week check how long does she think we can make it. no answer. we make ends meet right now but i'm looking to the future.
     
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    #1
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  3. Jan 3, 2011 #2
    Moosetek13

    Moosetek13 Road Train Member

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    18,747
    Nov 1, 2010
    Burnsville, MN
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    If I were you, I would not go OTR.

    Well, unless I was looking for a divorce in my future.
     
    Moosetek13, Jan 3, 2011
    Moosetek13, Jan 3, 2011
    #2
    halfburn Thanks this.
  4. Jan 3, 2011 #3
    GuysLady

    GuysLady Trucker Forum STAFF Staff Member

    18,041
    11,881
    Jun 20, 2007
    The eye of the storm....
    0
    I was just like her attitude-wise when my husband started this. Quite frankly, there is not one #### thing you can do to change her mind. She has to change it herself.
     
    GuysLady, Jan 3, 2011
    GuysLady, Jan 3, 2011
    #3
    Texas-Nana Thanks this.
  5. Jan 3, 2011 #4
    GoneButNotForgotten

    GoneButNotForgotten Heavy Load Member

    931
    1,844
    Dec 30, 2009
    Roxboro, N.C.
    0
    Are you making decent money off of your 40 hours? And will an OTR job be a major improvement money wise? Do you have young kids? Has your wife shown in the past that she is very "needy" and that the loss of you around the house will put her world into major turmoil?
    Only you can answer all the many questions as it pertains to your life. It sounds like you have a little bit of time to make your decision. Make good use of it and best of luck to you whatever your decision.
     
    GoneButNotForgotten, Jan 3, 2011
    GoneButNotForgotten, Jan 3, 2011
    #4
  7. Jan 3, 2011 #5
    sjbr549

    sjbr549 Bobtail Member

    23
    1
    Dec 5, 2010
    mount airy,nc
    0
    going otr will be about twice gross what i make now. she's never been needy just the opposite. we'll have a teenager in july. i went 3 months and never seen the state of nc and she was fine. if i wanted to go back to pipeline work and be gone 3weeks at a time she'd be fine. it's just something about a truck driving she don't like. getting cdl's ain't it. i've had them since 2000. just cornfused about it. i ask her and she tells me if i don't know she ain't telling me. i mean wtf kind of answer is that
     
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    #5
  8. Jan 3, 2011 #6
    stranger

    stranger Road Train Member

    3,640
    4,959
    Oct 10, 2006
    NC
    0
    She believes there is a wild woman at every truckstop. You can count on that being what is on her mind. BTDT years ago.
     
    stranger, Jan 3, 2011
    stranger, Jan 3, 2011
    #6
  9. Jan 3, 2011 #7
    sjbr549

    sjbr549 Bobtail Member

    23
    1
    Dec 5, 2010
    mount airy,nc
    0
    it ain't the wild women on her mind. we've been married 15 years. she tells me that when she's mad at me and i have no clue why. we have'nt had a fight in almost 2 yrs and i can fell one coming just don't know what it's going to be about.
     
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    sjbr549, Jan 3, 2011
    #7
  10. Jan 3, 2011 #8
    stranger

    stranger Road Train Member

    3,640
    4,959
    Oct 10, 2006
    NC
    0
    5 years, 5 days, 5 decades, a wife that has never been out here thinks there are wiley women waiting at every stop. When the truth finally comes out, let me know if I am right or not.

    My first wife thought this, which was largely true in the 70's, though I wasn't doing anything. I had a good driving job that had me home on certain days within a few hours every time. If I was more than a few hours late getting home for any reason, she would meet me at the door wanting to know who I had been with. This eventually cost us our marriage.
     
    stranger, Jan 3, 2011
    stranger, Jan 3, 2011
    #8
  11. Jan 3, 2011 #9
    Rollover the Original

    Rollover the Original Road Train Member

    3,206
    2,712
    Jul 1, 2009
    Springfield,MO
    0
    How do you come to the figure that you'll make more money driving over underground work? What numbers are you being told?
     
    Rollover the Original, Jan 3, 2011
    Rollover the Original, Jan 3, 2011
    #9
  12. Jan 3, 2011 #10
    Moosetek13

    Moosetek13 Road Train Member

    14,846
    18,747
    Nov 1, 2010
    Burnsville, MN
    0
    sjbr, you say she is not needy.

    But, from what you have described, she is probably more needy than you think.
    "i ask her and she tells me if i don't know she ain't telling me."

    That really sounds like a woman that needs something she is not getting, to me.

    "ever since i told her i did that, it's like i killed someone or don't love her. the first thing she said was i'll never be home or make any money and been in a pissy mood ever since."

    So does that.


    It's good to look to the future. But in what aspect of your future are you focusing on? It sounds like it may not be the same thing your wife is looking at, or at least not in the same way.
     
    Moosetek13, Jan 3, 2011
    Moosetek13, Jan 3, 2011
    #10
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