Need advice from an experienced O/O - juggling family and business

salvage your father-son relationship and get out of the business relationship asap

 

ditto

seconded

amen!

Etc

 

Nothing wrong with using plastic IF you pay it off in full every month.

You can exercise "Plan B" and buy your own truck(s) and run them the way you want.

 

That is my first thought as well, however, if you get out and his inabilitys bring this business down on him, will he blame you? I think you need to get him alone and have a good heart to heart with him. See if you can get things worked out with him before you just jump ship.

 

Son? Is that you? LOL.

Not to make light of your situation, but I can relate to this from the "Dad" side of the story. And I'll also note that there has to be more to the story, and I respect you for not putting all your dirty laundry out there. You don't state you and Dad's ages, financial stakes in the business, backgrounds in trucking (and business for that matter), exact roles, and whatnot. And you really don't need to. Here's what I'm talking about:

Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm sensing the handling of the truck break down is the tip of the iceberg. There seems to be a couple of bigger undercurrents in play that are making it a bigger deal than it is.

1. Friction about everyone's contribution to the business as a whole. Honestly, you're sounding too much like a victim. Maybe you are. There's a lot of resentment in your post about what Dad isn't doing, and why his decisions don't have much merit. Maybe you're right. You and your Dad (sounds like Mom is involved too) need to see eye to eye on roles, responsibilities, and decision authority. Get that fixed right now, before you even move on to the repair issue. Sounds like you're the sole driver. If you're out there OTR with this resentment churning around in your head every waking moment, it's going to end badly. It may not be this repair issue. Or the next. It may not be a blow out. Your business may unwind with death from 1,000 cuts. Maybe your Dad isn't clear on what things you depend on him for, or how critical certain things on that list are to you. If you can't come to terms, you need to be prepared to negotiate an exit strategy. No matter how emotional it gets, you can't dump a pile of crap on your family because you have hurt feelings over doing too much of the work. Maybe they were näive about what it was really going to take to back you in business. Maybe your family is just not in the right place for this business right now. If you can't compromise on running the business, you need to at least shut it down in a way that preserves your family relationship and has everyone coming out the other end as whole as possible.

2. Difference in strategy. Maybe there's a reason your Dad thinks it best to handle this repair the way he's doing it. Maybe there's funding or cash flow issues he's not been perfectly clear about. Maybe you're thinking optimistically about the repair completion and payment milestones and handling methods. Maybe he trusts your mechanical insight but doesn't trust your ability to handle the negotiation of time and payment. I can't tell. You need to take a hard look at this scenario end-to-end and ask yourself: is the way he's handling this really that bad? If so, you need to be clear about exactly what you disagree with and negotiate it. Not argue. Not rant. Negotiate. Check your emotion. Demand an understanding of his position and logic, then see if you still have a problem. If the truck's going to be down two weeks, don't panic over hours or a day or two. He may be planning that long ride in the pickup to do exactly this with you (quality time with a captive audience) and you're just too mad to see it coming. It would probably be the best use of the extra gas money that you never expected.

I have had a couple of hot conversations with my own son in the course of our own business venture. It happens in every business relationship, and even more when family is involved. In our case it almost always starts with some sort of setback (scheduling, break downs, etc) with him having too much time to think. Add to that, he almost never sees me working. He gets his dispatches and an occasional call to see if a load is going to work. Think about that a minute. Many times, I'm burning up the phones while he's sleeping off his 10 and all he sees is the end result of that. When he comes through for a break, he understandably doesn't stick around much. It makes it really easy for him to concoct a vision that I'm just lounging all the time surfing the internet, getting daily free showers, and sleeping in every morning while he's doing all the sacrifice and hard work. Be the bigger man and take this thing by the horns. Don't let resentment take over.

PM me a phone number if you want to chat. I may not tell you what you want to hear, but I can probably offer you some insight. Coincidentally, we're facing some repair challenges at the moment that are much worse than what you've shared. It's hard on everybody. Don't let it get you stupid and irrational.