Relationships, Trucking, Kids, Time Away, What new drivers need to know.

I couldn't figure out how it sounded bad myself, so don't worry about it.

 

I've been in the military for the past 21 years and retire in October. I have a 13yo and 16yo and I have missed a lot. But I think what's important and has worked for me through the years is to make sure the time you spend with each other is quality time. Although I've been gone 75% of the time I've made it a point to still stay involved and have made sure they have nothing but good memories.

 

TTT bump for a good read.

 

I only have to say this -- If you are dating or engaged to someone, let your significant other live his or her life. There is absolutely no need to call 40x day. I just got through sharing a truck with someone who was on the phone with his girlfriend about every 20 minutes. Grow up. Get a life. Put the #### phone down and do your job. Drive. Your relationship is not in trouble if you only talk once per day. If anything, you might have more meaningful things to say to each other, instead of nagging, rehashing and talking about nothing.

 

True enough Criminey and well said. The last company I had employed 27 people. My current company employees just 3. The difference is texting and social media. I watched a guy get 10 texts from his girlfriend during a 20 minute meeting. I decided I didn't want to stress out about paying full time wages to people who want to goof off all day. Checking personal messages at work is no different than stealing postage, I just don't know why people don't see this.

 

Believe me when I say that it's not all it's cracked up to be. Those 14 hour days with little time at home for anything but a shower and dinner before you hit the rack can be worse than being out all week. I'm going back out regional in 2 weeks simply because my wife and I fought more with me local than on the road. We get but a half hour together before I have to go to bed, then she has to tip-toe around the house because I'm a fairly light sleeper. If you have kids, trying to keep them quiet while you sleep may be a challenge as well, especially if they're young and your bedtime is well ahead of theirs. Trucking, no matter if your otr, regional, or local is a tough business and can and will create stresses that aren't often there in other careers.

Local jobs can be very rewarding if you find the right one with favorable hours, start/finish times, etc. But in many instances, they are not the shangri-la of trucking that many of us hope for.

 

This was a very helpful thread, there is an ample amount of time at hand while chasing these white lines to contemplate the priorities, intentions and purposes that drive us to staying on the road.

I personally am extremely close to my little sprout. He's a whopping 1.5yr old Lil pistol. I was local for two yrs and equally involved in every stage of his life and loved it. We married post-birth and I stayed local until recently.

We mutually decided due to our financial situation that given this specific opportunity and considering all other factors, that going OTR for a short period of time (if done right) "saving more, spending less" will set forth a more promising future for my small fam.

Our constant reminders when I'm gone for 3 weeks at a time are "short term pain, for long term gain", even if this wasn't the case later on, in the present it suffices the sadness of being away from sprout watching a lot of his firsts, etc..

With all of this being said, I do enjoy being on the road some of the time, it's a thing that just, well I guess it suits my drifter type personality. However, since I'm a father and husband now, it doesn't necessarily fit my situation and that's where it's hard.

I wrestle often with many variables e.g.
I do well on the road, but I miss my son, I miss my wife, I made a decent income local and was always home but when home I was zapped from 12-14hr 300 mile radius drop n hooks work days.
I'm independent OTR now making a very healthy income, which was our goal but I'm away, but when I'm home we all spend all day long n night every day playing on our property with the side by side or having them help me on the tractor making my kids first deer plot above his first tree blind, zoo, dinners, movies, etc. so it's great time and we both realize that but it still gets difficult after first week and I see my kid crying daddy in his car seat .
And is money really the motive, if so that can't be right, or fair, or is it necessary for us temporarily. But either way, it's very difficult on all of us, I am hopeful this will all make sense and this can be a short term deal that was a success for my fams progress, so far it has but it gets hard out here on these roadwayz to say the least. At the same note, I like being on the road vs local deals same thing every day same pay every week usually. Out here I kinda set the pace for our earnings, and we spend less, we fight less, more quality time when together.

So it's a battle but I guess two things really stick out to me in all of this (quality time & healthy income) those two things along with consistency will help make this a better situation for a fam involved in this type of career I believe.

I will say this, I'm thankful my wife has a very large and close knit family that she stays with when I'm gone and all help with the sprout and she enjoys being with them. So this kind of OTR life works with her to a degree, she likes the fact we have a healthy income and bank acct and bills are paid etc, but we both obviously miss each other, at the end of the day we're both adults and can read the silver lining if you may. But the hardest part I struggle with is (my boy), do I want to be that kind of dad? Is that kind of dad really all that bad ? I don't want nobody else to hold the responsibility of raising my boy, that is a responsibility I thoroughly enjoy and have always intended on doing well at that.

Needless to say, I appreciate all the wisdom, it spoke to me, not that truckers hear voices or anything lol.
#goodread ✌️

 

I would go local too, but I'm glad I'm a regional driver. From what the local drivers are telling me, I get more home time and better miles, and they are home for a 10 - which is actually more like a 7 once they get settled at home - and I get 34-48 hours after being out 2-3 days and still average 2600mi/wk. My kids are very young, so home time is priceless to me, and I find I value the time with family more than I did before as well. Facetime or Facebook video chat are helpful tools too.

 

I would not sign on anywhere that does not get you home EVERY week. I was never gone more than 4 or 5 days the few years I would travel more than a few hundred miles from the door and always home weekends. Kids are worth it and the ol' boot usually needs her oil changed once a week if not more