Methods to keep awake + alert

i hope this is sarcasm, because those three words won't console that mans family members that you swerved into, not seeing is never an excuse

 

If you are not afraid of needles just start you a IV Drip with Human growth hormone, Killer whale sperm, and Gorilla spit..

Or

Practice your audible calls and shot gun stomp. Your throwing motions and option pitches to the half back. Also constantly make sure your phone has signal just in case some nfl teams needs a quarterback.

 

Usually will down a Starbucks Double Shot espresso or Red Bull. If that doesn't work I'll put on my Don Johnson Miami Vice suit and do a couple lines of quality Colombian blow.

Really though if you're tired, just stop.

 

There goes that S word again. Ain't nobody got time for that!!!

 

Not with all these new rules and regulations. Sometimes it takes all day just to update your license. Those fingerprinting places ain't conveniently located and they are not open on weekends.

 

I go to sleep when tired ...... shuldnt need for uppers when tired go to bed plain simple

 

Spill a half cup of hot coffee on yourself.....that'll wake you faster than drinking it.

 

a couple of alligator clips or vise grips attached to each nipple will work wonders keeping you awake, if ya don't have clips or vise grips, unzip your pants , pull out the sausage and while its still out, zip up the zipper , pinch the sausage in the zipper good and tight and you will be good for at least 6 more hours of drive time.

but if ya cant handle that, just get some sleep

 

Chew....

Anything.

Chewing pumps blood into your brain therefore making you more alert and have more energy.

 

LMAO! Thats too funny