Infuriate a Trucker in One Sentence

Reading this thread was hilarious, loved it.

I’m fortunate I don’t deal with many of these anymore like I used to but I can feel everyone’s pain. My favorites:

“Sorry no bathrooms for drivers”
I was a local driver in a daycab and have been there a 100 times. This was after a 3 hour unload. I actually urinated on the building and they banned me.

“We can’t load this trailer it isn’t acceptable for food grade packaging”
My reply: “I know it’s old dented and abused but just like your wife it was the only one available” he was a friend and i thought he was going to die laughing.

“Sorry we don’t have a crane operator to unload you until tomorrow”
I was told this literally at a crane company that rents cranes and crane operators. That’s like a restaurant without food.

“Dude why are we in the same truckstop when it’s my turn to drive?”
I asked my codruver after waking up. The moron actually drove in the wrong direction almost 300 miles then had to turn around and go the right way. He said he got confused and thought the gps was broken.

 

I believe I have the best one:

“Society will never respect or appreciate your profession”

 

Company I used to work for had drivers swore this one true: Boss dispatched a half-dozen pneumatics the day before to a drilling rig in South Texas out of Corpus Christi office. Maybe a 90-minute drive after loading.

Everyone told to leave yard early to load at mill. Some loaded that night. Traffic out in the bush could skunk you. Best to sleep on the lease road back to the rig the night before.

One guy calls in xtra late on delivery, says his fuel card is refused on daily limit (which was like 200-gals).

On his way to the rig?
It’s in San Diego (TX).

This guy made it just over 700-miles to the halfway point at El Paso TX. Told mama he was headed to Cali.

Wonder if he told her about his $800 reimbursement for fuel.

I’ll place my hand on a Bible, raise my right hand, to swear, yes, there are drivers that stupid in South Texas.

Work 19-straight and get told a delivery was missed BECAUSE of same. You’re closer to mill to reload and deliver. Other guy was headed to Galveston mill or something.
.

 

When phrases have an entirely different meaning.

"We work on it" means, "we have no clue".

"I'll send and email" (to the person next at the desk)

 

I done that once in Wyoming. Drove 50 miles. Couldn't figure out why the miles were getting higher on gps. Then I looked at the mile markers. LOL

 

Its built into the rate

 

If you want a few minutes with the lower half, that’ll cost extra

 

or they have it during hours that 99% of the drivers are out making deliveries!

 

As long as you don’t try peeling off my NY HUT sticker with your DOT bumper when you cut back over I don’t care who passes.

 

Strangely, that one doesn't really bother me.