What if it Snows?

Discussion in 'Questions From New Drivers' started by Dave_in_AZ, Mar 19, 2018.

  1. Espressolane

    Espressolane Road Train Member

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    Ok, here you go. This works. Don’t ask how I know.

    3D Warehouse
     
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  3. okiedokie

    okiedokie Road Train Member

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    Good luck in whatever you decide Dave. If you get up here, we like cats.
     
  4. Espressolane

    Espressolane Road Train Member

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  5. Dave_in_AZ

    Dave_in_AZ Road Train Member

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    You compartmentalize PTSD. You lock it away somewhere. Unfortunately you can't jettison it. You're stuck with it. That's why so many guys drink or do dope. Drown out the noise.

    I'm just F'd. I don't think I'm going back to church. I've written this before. Just never in a million years will I ever fit in with a real family. Somewhere's me and The OM have to find our place.

    There's been a number of times I've been totally okay with dying. Then you're given a glimmer of hope to F with you, and just prolong the agony for whatever F'd up reason.

    Don't know where we gonna find it, but it won't be there. Been a WTF hardened loner pretty much all my life. Didn't want it that way, but people get blessed, people get #### on, just the way it is. We gonna find us someplace where we fit. There's got to be someplace where we're not looked down upon. Gonna die that way too.

    It's WTF difficult for me to approach people. Especially a group of people. It stems from always being the new kid. The second anyone starts posturing, I'm already on my way to figuring how I'm defend myself. It's just F'd. I'm just F'd.

    The guys I ran with as a young adult..........the president of the club was shaking his head going," How the F are you not in prison?" I mean when they're even kinda amazed you made it that far, you know you've been around the block too many times.

    And God just keeps me hanging around. So, so many times I should have been toast, but I must be one of his favorite markers on the big table him and Satan get their rocks off on.
     
  6. Cowboyrich

    Cowboyrich Road Train Member

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    Deming NM work for you? Have a 1/4 acre there I've never seen.
     
  7. Carpenter Scotty

    Carpenter Scotty Medium Load Member

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    I’m sad to hear you struggling, I don’t know much about you fella’s on here or your journey through life.
    I can identify with the being the new kid part. I discovered that the bad kids are a lot more accepting of new people than the good ones. After a few new schools you are getting pretty good at being bad. I had to completely walk away from everyone I knew to change my ways for the better.
    I fell off the rails here in the city for a few years, but it does get better. Keep on , you don’t have to win all the days, just keep playing
     
  8. Cowboyrich

    Cowboyrich Road Train Member

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    That last part is my wife's son, problem is that when he gets out he starts going to all the wrong places, most of his life in a prison, still can't figure it out and normally ends up right back inside. To say something my wife hates... stupid is as stupid does.
     
  9. Carpenter Scotty

    Carpenter Scotty Medium Load Member

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    We do the things that are familiar or habit despite how they affect us sometimes. By sheer luck and a good lawyer a few times, that’s not me.
    Could have been so easily. I didn’t do anything profound or have one grand realization, you just got to find your own way there bit by bit.
    Hopefully your stepson gets there
     
  10. Cowboyrich

    Cowboyrich Road Train Member

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    I understand he's walking a hard road, but life is hard and he built the the road.
    I hope he gets there, a great guy is buried inside him.
     
  11. Carpenter Scotty

    Carpenter Scotty Medium Load Member

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    You can want it for them, you can help them with it , but you can’t do it for them unfortunately. I have lost some coworkers over the years to out of control problems
     
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