a little advice about where to live

its not that I don't want a woman, its more that i'll never have one

I don't know where all my money keeps going, unless I don't have that much to begin with.

 

for starters i'm not all that good looking or attractive, that's the biggest thing holding me back. Everyone can say "its on the inside that matters" but when people don't even look at you or make eye contact with you because of your outside its hard to see their inside.

I have a job as an OTR truck driver and i'm gone for long peroids of time, thats not anything that any girl between the ages of 18-32 would ever go for unless they know how the industry works. Truck Driving isn't a very "sexy" profession, its the most disliked by the civilan world becasue we clog up traffic, cause accidents that injure "D-list" celebrities and kill other people, idle our trucks and put crap in the air. Then Truck drivers aren't known as the worlds sexiest people, we're overweight, are incredibly unhappy, and Blame everyone else for our problems (tell me that sentence isn't true, we see it every day)

I come home randomly, if i'm in the area I ask if I can come home, so I never know i'm coming home until 12-24 hours until I do finally come home, I don't know if my company even has a "this is how you go home" policy, but I know enough about this industry where I doubt that. its kind of rude and disrespectful to call her up and say "hey, i'll be home in 12 hours" because what if she had other plans now I ruined them. I'm gone 28-30 days a month so she'll be seeing some other guy (or girl) in that time. and will probably still see them 1 or 2 of the 3 days i'm home. if I complain then i'm single

Anyway, not only am I unattractive and am a truck driver a girl will later learn that I am not really all that great as "arm candy" or whatever it is people do with their boyfriends, I have alot of charachter flaws that will scare women away, I have a voice that nobody wants to hear, I have no personality, and I am not very smart so I will focus on the 1 or 2 things I know something about and always talk about that. As somebody who has never had a relationship that 1) was of any quality 2) that even lasted, I am basicly a virgin or rookie in this relationship business, there is no excuse for that. if they want a "rookie" they can go date a 13 year old boy (ok bad analogy, 12 year old boy)

Most 18-32 year old girls want a diffrent future than I want mine. Most of them want something that I don't ever want or ever want to give them (unless it already was there when I showed up, in which case I will love the heck out of it until we break up, but i'm not giving them another one)

I don't think I have much of a personality, and the few hobbies and interests I have really aren't things that are popular anymore so nobody cares about them. Model Railroading hasn't been popular in 30 years (for some reason) and NASCAR is losing popularity so quickly that people even forget it exists half the time. Computers are losing popularity too. Each and every one of those things are full of negative stereotypes and not one of them is "sexy" as a hobby.

The fact I am unattractive, an OTR Driver, have no personality, have no future plans that are remotely interesting and even have the voice of silent films are just some of the reasons why I will never have a girlfriend.

 

I am unable to stand up to my parents, if I do i'm being 'disrespectful' and they will not allow their children to disrespect them. I can't tell them "its my money so I am free to do what I want with them" then they'll remind me that I am a guest in their house and they don't have to spend their money on anything while i'm there, they can cut the power to my room and even saw the roof off my room so that they aren't spending 1 dime on me while i'm there

standing up for myself is disrespectful to them, but them just being bullying and abusive is them being parents. If this is really what parenting is then I don't want any children, I dont want to put anyone through this because this just seems mean