THE ADVENTURES CONTINUE - DFO gets a truck and hops on Schneider's IC Choice Program

So I get up to my delivery in VA and drop the load. I asked at the gate if they had any empties and they said no. Of course they DO have empties, but this place triple-stacks empty trailers and are too lazy to move others out of the way so you can get to the empties at the back. So, sent exception, got a trailer search and off I go.

Make it to the first place, no empties, of course.

Send another exception, wait, get another search, off I go again.

Get to this second place, and... no empties.

Losing my patience, before I'm about to storm off the guard says hang on let me call our other yard and see, thankfully at the other yard there were some empties and I was able to pick one up. So there goes about 3 hours wasted chasing empties around Winchester VA. Luckily it was the end of my day anyway.

So I go pick up my next load and I'm headed back out of town to the interstate. Nice morning, got my drivers window down like I usually do when rolling through town, nice cool breeze... AND IT HAPPENS.

OH **** SON.

****ING WASP HORNET THING HITS THE MIRROR HOUSING

STRATEGICALLY PLACED CASCADIA MIRRORS DON'T JUST DEFLECT RAIN DROPS THEY DEFECT WASP HORNET BEE BUG THINGS INTO THE WINDOW AS WELL

IT'S ALL PLAYING OUT IN SLOW MOTION

IT GETS DEFLECTED OFF THE MIRROR THROUGH THE OPEN WINDOW

I FEEL IT HIT MY CHEST

OH. ****. WHERE IS IT.

Now I'll step back and just say I have this absolute irrational fear of wasps/bees/yellow jackets/hornets/etc., bugs in general, but especially these. Stingers and the crunch sound they make when stepped on or hit... that sound... it absolutely makes my skin CRAWL. I really don't have any phobias but now that I think about it, yes, I am absolutely terrified by these things.

So I'm still going through town, traffic and stoplights. At this point my skin has left my body and has jumped out of the passenger door running the opposite direction.

I'm trying to find where it went, but I don't really WANT to know where it went. So I'm like tugging at my shirt and my seatbelt trying to straighten them out, but at the same time NOT WANTING TO KNOW WHERE IT WENT.

THEN MY MIND GOES BACK TO A SIMILAR INCIDENT IN MY PICKUP TRUCK. LAST TIME THIS HAPPENED I ENDED UP DRIVING THE PICKUP OFF THE ROAD AT 35 MPH, LOCKING UP THE BRAKES ON THE GRASS SHOULDER AND JUMPING OUT AS FAST AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE.

REALIZING I CANNOT DO THAT WITH MY BIG TRUCK, I FEEL MY STOMACH SINK AS THE REALIZATION SETS IN THAT YES, I KNOW WHERE THIS BUG IS.

I STAND UP IN THE SEAT THE BEST I CAN WITH MY SEATBELT ON, AND PUSH MYSELF BACK, AND

OH

****

*******

****

******

THERE IT IS.

ITS ABOUT 2 INCHES AWAY FROM MY CROTCH.

ITS REGAINING CONSCIOUSNESS.

THE ****ING STINGER IS MOVING BACK AND FOURTH TRYING TO STING SOMETHING.

THE LEGS ARE MOVING IN THE AIR, THOSE ****ING ANGLED CREEPY JAGGED WASP BEE LEGS... ****

I'M STILL TRYING TO DRIVE THE TRUCK AND NOT TOTALLY LOSE MY ****.

At this point the truck is idling along in 9th gear as I cannot will myself to sit my junk down on top of this bug to press the clutch or the throttle.

I look around and grab the first pen I can find in my cupholder.

THE HORNET IS NOW BECOMING COMPLETELY SELF AWARE.

LAST CHANCE.

I FLICK THE BUG OFF THE SEAT ON TO THE FLOOR.

SIT BACK DOWN, DOWNSHIFT AND GET THE TRUCK MOVING AGAIN.

THEN I LOOK DOWN

OH ****

IT'S DOING A BUG DONUT BURNOUT ON THE FLOOR.

**** IS ABOUT TO ****ING HIT THE AFTERBURNER AND TAKE OFF OR SOMETHING.

I HAVE TO DO IT.

I TAKE MY BOOT AND SMASH IT ON THE FLOOR.

AND IT MAKES THAT ****ING CRUNCH SOUND.

I CAN STILL HEAR IT

I CAN STILL *FEEL* IT.

FASJDKFJAS;FJSL;KFJAS;LFJASF

Then I resume driving the truck to the truckstop. I keep glancing down at it on the way to the truckstop and then I CAN'T FIND IT.

**** I MUST HAVE KICKED IT SOMEWHERE.

I want to know where it is but then again I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

Finally I see it over in the crease between the door flame and the floor.

I get parked.

Look down

IT IS REVIVING ITSELF AGAIN.

LEGS MOVING

THOSE CREEPY MULTI SECTION BODY PIECES SQUIRMING

WHAT THE **** KIND OF NIGHTMARE **** ARE THESE THINGS.

I open my door.

Try to flick it out with my glove. I won't actually put the glove on I'm holding the glove with 2 fingers trying to rake it over the bug and make it go out the door frame.

It won't ****ing move its caught in the door frame.

Finally I get it on a piece of cardboard.

Launch it out the door.

It lands in the parking spot of the Volvo next to me.

It's that drivers dead/dying hornet now.

Not my problem.

I immediately jump out of the truck and head for the truckstop.

Oh Jesus I will never drive with my window cracked below mirror height again.

So that was my day.