I was observed during Pre-Emp Urine test

Can I borrow some tinfoil...?

I need a new hat......

 

I am not sure if places test for bacterial content, but apparently this does not work at all places. In my last job saw them give the terminate or resign to 3 over a 6 month period for irregular bacterial counts, or at least that was what HR called it, and their Managers were also shown the door. They all admitted they used someone else's urine. When I asked about the bacterial counts, apparently if you donated at let's say 1 PM, and they test it at 11 PM, the Lab Tech knows the bacterial count should be between 2 numbers. They won't tell me what those numbers are, but they said they stand behind it, and it is scientifically accepted. They could be joking, but I find it odd the 3 I knew of admitted it when they were being given the option, so there must be something to it.

 

When I went through the cattle call physical on the first day of CDL training there was at least one guy that wanted to be observed. He was a big, strapping young man of about 450 lbs. The setup was a little closet office with a restroom attached. Obtain your sample, come out and hand the cup to the girl processing the urine. This fellow goes in and after a couple of seconds she starts yelling.

"You weren't supposed to piss right next to me! Use the bathroom!"

That's the first time I ever heard someone called an oaf in real conversation. Good times.

 

maybe the collection dude was gay?

 

If you can't stop peeing mid stream then you probably have prostate cancer, you may want to see a doctor

 

I see my doctor regularly. Thank you for your suggestion.

 

as i do see my specialist as well. that is not a cause or symptom of cancer.

 

All men if we live long enough will get prostate cancer.