A dirty friend

And what makes you think that you are his future?
Are you responsible for that in some way?

I understand that you want to help out a friend.
What are you willing to lose in the process?

A dirty drug addict (by your own words in your OP) is not a person you should trust your life to.
It is not a person you should trust your truck to.
It is not a person you should trust the load with.
And it is not a person you should trust to make any on time deliveries.

I should have listed that in the exact reverse order, in order of magnitude. But I'm sure you get the point.

This isn't a romp in the park that you want to share with your friend.
It is your livelihood, your business, your truck, your credibility, your life - not to mention the lives of others all around your truck.

No matter what his 'intentions' are - he needs to be clean in every way before you EVER consider taking him in your truck.
He needs to clean up his act before he drives. Not after or during.

 

It was really hard to see my friends going down the wrong path. But, I had to move on from that and know that it was just too much for me to give up to help them.

If you want to invest in your friend, do it in a way that doesn't put your own livelihood in danger. Who's going to help you when you have a truck, but no CDL?

 

Bad idea. Plane and simple.

 

How about this? Help him to get help cleaning up. Advise him on getting into company sponsored training. Then after he has a year of experience you can consider it. Now I am talking about REAL help not shaving his head and waiting 90 days before applying. That is all you should be willing to do at this time.

 

I am not against drugs. I smoked weed when I was in college over 15 years ago. Honestly I don't think it is any worse than alcohol. That being said when you get out in the real world you have to decide what is more important - getting high or getting a good job. Sure there are exceptions but for the most part dopers end up in dead end jobs without room for advancement.

I have had probably close to 100 employees over the past ten years ranging from manual labor to college grads and some of them smoked. The pot smokers are stuck in a rut. Most of them care more about getting high than really anything else. They won't quit smoking to better themselves. As an employer you can't trust them or give them any responsibilities. I don't think the weed fries their brains or anything like that I just think that people who chose to smoke weed on a regular basis throughout life have messed up priorities in lots of aspects of their lives.

My point is his situation he is in is due to his priorities and lack of self control. You can't fix that by giving him a chance. He needs to get in the right path himself before you stick your neck out for him.

 

I would give this scenario a hard pass. Why? Your friend's problem isn't the pot, it's the work ethic. That's where you are going to see the flaw unfold in your plan. How about this for a suggestion:

Accept your friend for who he is and offer assistance when asked to include anything except:
1. Trying to change him.
2. Wanting him to change more than he wants to change.
3. Investing in a future that is not his passion.
4. Investing more in his future than he personally invests.

My best friend smokes pot EVERY DAY... Every fricken day. Without fail. No one works harder than she does or promotes more good in their circle of influence. She's a dedicated leader and an absolute pleasure to be around. I would do anything to support her passions without limit because she is my best friend and I trust her with my life. The pot doesn't change that.

She respects my long standing desire to remain drug free and I respect her decision to stay out of an industry that doesn't allow her to be her true self.

 

Well said Mr. Henley

 

Nope, nope, and more nope.

If you want your friend to remain your friend, and not a liability that pisses you off, just stop now.

Like Tequilasunrise said. You can't fix stupid, no matter how much you like it.

 

Had a friend that was an alcoholic. I had a food service gig where I would leave out Sunday nght, back Monday morning. Leave out Wednesday night back Friday morning, $1200/a week after taxes. Not a bad gig. My co driver quit and I got my buddy on with me. We would get a motel Monday night and Thursday night. At first, my buddy was fine. Then he started going to the motel lounge. That's fine too. Then he started meeting new friends from the lounge and going to the casino. That pissed me off, I said something to him about it and he got pissed off and stayed in the truck. Well, then he started closing the bars down. We were unloading our last stop, and he was drunk as a skunk. The manager at the restaurant which was our last stop noticed. He got cut. I was a young guy and thought I was being a friend trying to help him, but the only thing that happened was that his behavior got worse and almost cost me my job. That was my mistake trying to help a friend.

I retired from trucking, and I went back into private security. Had a friend that had a shop where we would build turbocharged imports (the riceboy movement was in full swing). This guy was an excellent mechanic. BUT he was hooked on those OCs. He'd show up for work at 0800, take an OC and they'd make him sick, so he would lie down til noon and then start work. I tried to help him. I was wrenching for free trying to help him stay afloat. He was always behind. I finally convinced my friend to quit, and he did. He started working out again, got back into the martial arts...great! I told him that the only way he would be able to break free is if he'd dump all of his pill head friends. He told his friends that he quit OCs. You know what happened? His friends started coming up to the shop bringing him OCs for free. They drug him back in, while we were building my car for a cannonball (I was paying money!) He needed more money so he decides to shortchange me. I call a wrecker and remove my car and never went to his shop again. Soon, he lost the shop, lost his wife and kids, and all of his so call friends sit around and marvel about how he squandered his life.

Anyways, you knew that everyone would be against that idea. You know the rules of the road. You know that your friend cannot follow the rules of the road. You are thinking that you can help him and cover for him. YOU CANNOT HELP HIM. What would happen is that he would expect for you to cover for him, do most if the work, YET, he would expect to get paid half. He would use you for a crutch, and would be angry at you if he didn't get an even share. Eventually, even if you gave him an even share, it won't be enough. Working stiffs do not make enough money to support drug addicts.

"Six, he just does a little weed. He's not a drug addict."

Really? Why can't he stop then? Your idea is foolish. If you want to give him free money, give him free money. Risking your livelihood by going into business with a drug addict is not a good idea.

5 years from now, you won't even talk to him anymore.

 

Want to make a much better adult decision? Use that money to move out of your parents, keep driving company making good money. Ditch the loser friends. Yes, I sound mean, but I was in a similar situation and made the wrong choice...