Driving with a case of asteroids

Now you tell me,I blew the window out-it was an assteroid ya know.

 

Yeah a mistake sure!
I fell getting out of the truck once and landed on my tail bone right on the edge of the step GAWD that hurt I dang near ripped the right butt cheek off ( well it felt like it) had a cut right in the center of the crack over the tail bone. I couldn't sit at all and called my dispatcher ,he had to call me back he was laughing so hard! I laid in the bunk for 3 days and it bothered me for MONTHS geez it hurts again just thinking about it!

Ok funny boy you can stop laughing now!

 

Preparation H is your friend. Just remember, it is a SUPPOSITORY! Don't swallow it, and if you DO swallow it, use PLENTY of water!

 

Read that and almost died laughing. All I could think about, was the story, Larry the Cable guy, told about his grandmother..... in spandex.... and her walking farts.

 

Go to the tire shop and get yourself a tube for a wheelbarrow tire. Year's ago I jacked up the cab on KW COE and used the tube to getr from Northern Ontario to Vancouver BC.

Then I had them surgically removed....it still ghurts when I think about it......

 

There is a magic 'snake oil' out there that cures all sorts of nasty things... Mycitricin is the brand name. WalMart has the generic Equate brand called 'triple antibiotic ointment'. This stuff is great for healing cuts in flatbedders fingers. It healed up my jock-itch, and my recent case of 'athletes foot' fungi. I kid you not... And, it is 'better than Preparation H'. Ya hear me??
Clean area w/HandiWipes. Rub some on. Drive no more than 11 hrs....(not 14!!)

 

here is my cure: (my dad told me this long ago)
Drive (sit) with butt cheeks together, not separated; eat lots of vegetables to get plenty of substance that will hold water, this will allow less time on the potty. Lots of meat and potatoes and not very much water in diet causes a hard stool which causes straining, which leads to the condition mentioned. A bowl of fiber 1 a day (or an apple) will help a lot. Use a hemorrhoid conditioned wipe after going number 2 to help with the itching etc..
Both straining (struggling) to potty and sitting incorrectly are what need to be addressed.
As a side note: women who strain to give birth do develop hemorrhoids because of the straining, but it is a condition that can be corrected over time. Surgery is not always needed.
Hope this helps.

 

Well; how in the heck can they not be together? It ain't like the other cheeks where you can yawn and spread them apart...

 

jeez prarie boy--ya sure it wasnt the valve stem of that tube in your butt that was causing the discomfort?

 

Jeezzzzzz it was sore.

The tune I speak of was what sealed the air cleaner intake pipe to the air cleaner itself when the cab was down. But I had surgery 20 some years later and no more problems.