Drug testing problems?

Discussion in 'Questions From New Drivers' started by Pumpkin Oval Head, Apr 23, 2011.

  1. Pumpkin Oval Head

    Pumpkin Oval Head Road Train Member

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    Per the marijuana.com web site, here are some questions and answers that you may not have thought about:

    Excuses for Failing Your Test That Never Work

    The following excuses for failing a drug test are heard by MROs every day, and they absolutely never work:
    1. I was at a party where they were smoking, but I didn’t smoke any pot
    2. I didn’t inhale
    3. I didn’t know that the cookies, brownies, butter, etc. contained marijuana
    4. I have a medical marijuana “permit”
    5. I only took one or two of my wife’s pain pills for my headache
    6. My prescription wasn’t cutting it, so I doubled the dose
    7. I ate too many poppy seeds
    8. Someone spiked my drink
    9. “No way in hell! I don’t do drugs at all! The lab must have screwed up! I’m going to sue!”
    10. “But I don’t smoke pot any more, I quit a couple of weeks ago.”
    Additionally, none of the following excuses will work while trying to convince the collector that you aren’t attempting to adulterate, dilute or substitute a test:
    1. It’s cold because I just drank a milkshake
    2. I really need to keep my purse with me
    3. Can my friend come in with me?
    4. I need to run out to my car for something
    5. I just need to get something from my friend
    6. Can’t I come back tomorrow or later today?
    7. Not using toilet paper (females)
    8. After making urination sounds, walking around in the bathroom and waiting an excessively long time to open the door
    9. Dancing when you arrive, and your specimen looks completely clear (it’s happened)
    The following will only succeed in angering your collector:
    1. Do you really like your job?
    2. How can you do this day after day?
    3. This is violating my rights
    4. Don’t you trust me?
    5. This is really gross
    6. I would never take a job like this
    7. Man, what a #####
    8. This is really stupid
    9. I’m in a huge hurry, can I leave now?
    10. Urinating all over the bathroom and toilet.
    11. Flushing the toilet after being told not to – this is a big one!
    12. Urinating an inadequate amount in the cup then waiting to see if your bladder will find more urine to add with it
    13. Whining of any kind
    14. Can’t I cut my own hair?
    15. Do you really have to cut the hair from the head?
    16. Pretending you don’t understand the instructions
    If you are a marijuana smoker, it’s entirely possible that the substance can remain in your system for many, many weeks.
     
    Big John Thanks this.
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  3. REDD

    REDD The Legend

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    Dueling Banjoville
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    If you don't use drugs, you shouldn't fail a test.
     
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  4. Meltom

    Meltom Road Train Member

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    But you can't DAC me because I didn't work there, ha!
     
  5. BROKENSPROKET

    BROKENSPROKET Medium Load Member

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    Lucky you said shouldn't and not can't cuz it can happen. Phyto-cannabinoid metaboites(marijuana) and endo-cannaibinoid metabolites(from our own body) are indinguishable. That is why 50nm in the threshold before you get a positive. Very Very rarely does anyone go over 50nm naturally, but it has happened, so some scientists have reported. But some employers have ignorantly fired peolple for less than 50nm, but they did end up being sued.
     
  6. plentygood

    plentygood Road Train Member

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    That's some funny stuff!
     
    Pumpkin Oval Head Thanks this.
  7. Ranger_309

    Ranger_309 Medium Load Member

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    If you mean illegal drugs you are correct. There is however, an anti-aging drug that doesnt make one high or give you any symptoms that will effect your driving, that will show positive for meth on a first pass, until the extra step is done that proves it is not meth.
     
  8. ronin

    ronin Road Train Member

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    Then you should avoid an anti-aging drug, since it sounds like hooey, and watch your diet, get some exercise, and take vitamins instead.

    I can't get over how many times we've beaten this dead horse. Don't do drugs, or anything close to drugs, when trying to get (or keep) a job where you are tested for drugs!

    I'll gladly beat the dead horse some more and repeat that last paragraph.

    All the horsecrap stories about how I did poppy seed muffins and tested positive are just that - horsecrap. You smoked weed, but want to still be able to smoke AND work in this industry. Choose one.
     
    Elendil and misterG Thank this.
  9. Elendil

    Elendil Heavy Load Member

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    Exactly. The only people that test positive for drugs are drug users. People here talk like false positives are the norm. They are only deluding themselves so when they are finally caught they have themselves convinced it's not their fault.

    Almost every company I have worked for in the last 20+ years had some level of drug testing. It was rare for someone to test positive, and when they did, it was because they did drugs. With the sophistication of today's testing mistakes are few and far between.

    Put down the blunt, put on your big boy pants, and grow up.
     
  10. ronin

    ronin Road Train Member

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    But I'm innocent!! Yes, and you ask everyone in prison for radical crimes (not smoking a blunt, mind you), and they'll all say they're innocent, too. Prisons are FULL of innocent people.
     
  11. Ranger_309

    Ranger_309 Medium Load Member

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    So I should avoid a medication that millions over the world use to increase thier lifespan and keep thier minds free from dementia and parkinsons diesase,
    that has nothing in common with methampetamines? BTW, its not hooey. Its a med thats been around for 30 years and is proven to increase healthy minds and bodies.

    So now its OK if I have a shortened lifespan thanks to these insane drug laws? BTW, I dont use any of the drugs on the banned list including pot, and I never have, so get over it already.

    Thats OK then. When I become aged early you taxpayers can foot my heatlthcare bills...and you WILL too. :biggrin_25525:
     
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