Hi, I'm Snazzy and I'm Trucker

Discussion in 'The Welcome Wagon' started by Snazzy, Aug 3, 2007.

  1. Snazzy1

    Snazzy1 The Storyteller

    Aug 21, 2007
    Granbury, Texas
    Missy and I got dressed, as the knocking grew louder. I followed her to the door and stood behind her. Missy peeped through the peep hole.

    I whispered, " Who is it ? "

    Missy shrugged, " I don't know, I've never seen him before. "

    I peeped, " I don't know him ! Do you want me to find out ? "

    So, Missy did and I answered the door. He was an older fella, scuffy looking, wearing an old western shirt, blue jeans, cowboy hat, and needing a shave.

    I spoke first, " How you doing ? "

    Scuffy was drunk, " Are you Goose ? "

    I confessed, " Yeah, Barney Goose. What's up ? "

    Scuffy sized me up, " You don't look like much to me ! I'm Scuffy ! "

    I sensed the tention, " What can I do for you ? "

    Scuffy sneered, " Well ! You just going to stand there ! I said, I'm Scuffy ! "

    I drew a blank, " Listen ! I'm a little busy right now and ... "

    So, Scuffy charged me and the fight was on. Missy got knocked back, as we rolled on the floor. I managed to knee my way ontop and had Scuffy pinned down. He was trying to twist around, so I applied more presure. You know, I had him in a hammer lock, with his arm behind his back. We were still on the floor and Scuffy was eating the carpet.

    I sat on his back, " Lighten up, or I'll break your arm ! "

    He gave in, " Alright, let me up. "

    I didn't trust him, " Not until you tell me, what's going on ! "

    Scuffy swore, " Let me up and I will. "

    Missy had her cell phone, " Should I call 911 ? "

    I nixed the idea, " No ! Me and Scuffy are going over to Hook's. I'll be right back, just give me a minute. "

    So, I sashayed and Scuffy staggered over. I was careful to follow at a safe distance in case he tried anything. We bellied up to the bar and I ordered us a couple of beers.

    Capt Hook twisted the necks, " Everything all right Barn ? "

    I lied, " Peachy, just peachy ! Can you give us a minute ? "

    Hook got it. " I'll be over there if you need me. "

    I took a swig, " Go ahead and drink up ! Now, let me tell you something ! You see those bikers over there ? That's the Brothers Motorcycle Gang and I'm their acting War Lord. If you want to ... "

    Scuffy took a gulp, " She said, that your in a gang and I should of known better. I still say, I can take you in a fair fight ! "

    I lit a 100, " Why ? I mean, why would you want to ? I don't even know you and who the hell is she ? "

    Scuffy lit a 100, " Sherry ! She said, that you'd fight for her and ... "

    I spewed beer, " Do what ? You think that Sheery and I ... "

    Scuffy pushed his luck, " You don't have to lie and I know how it is ! I got busted and have been away, so you moved in. But, hear me out ! I'm back and she's mine ! You'll have to whip me a dozen Sundays and I don't care how many there are ! I'll fight your whole outfit ! "

    Mike staggered over, " Hey Barn ! Hey Scuffy ! Did you just get out ? "

    I had to ask, " Ya'll know each other ? "

    Mike nodded, " Yeah, this is Sherry's ole man and he's been away. "

    Scuffy was drunker than I thought, " I'm glad your here Mike ! You might as well hear this too ! Sherry is mine and you Brothers need to back off her ! "

    Mike squared off, " Run that by me again ? "

    I'd heard enough, " Listen, you two ! Capt Hook said, that one more fight in here and that we're all barred ! Now Scuffy, I don't have anything to do with Sherry and that's a fact ! If she's yours, well good luck to the both of you. No, not you and Mike ! I mean, you and Sherry ! Now Mike, if you want to mop the floor with this Idiot. Well, take it outside and don't let Hook see you. Man, this is too much ! "

    So, I sashayed back to Missy's and knocked on her door. You know, I didn't care what Mike and Scuffy did. Yep, they could kill each other and .. Well, no I didn't mean that. I meant, ... Well, you know what I mean, as Life Goes On. What a deal !

    Nightie night Snazzers, your Snazzy1.
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  3. Snazzy1

    Snazzy1 The Storyteller

    Aug 21, 2007
    Granbury, Texas
    Sorry Starcommander, I didn't see you sneak in between post. Let's see what happens, as Life Goes On.

    Missy had put on a pair of tight fitten jeans and her mood had changed too.

    She folded her arms, " Who was that guy and ... "

    I butted in, " You'd never guess ! That was Sherry's Ole Man and ... "

    Missy was blunt, " That's it ! I can't deal with this anymore ! I thought, it'd be nice if we could get to know each other. But, .... "

    I down played it, " He's over there with Mike and won't be bothering us again. We don't have to worry about him or Sherry. "

    Missy shrugged, " Well, alright ! But Barney, I'm not going to put up with this and you can understand. "

    So, I understood and moved things along. You know, assured her that things would be different and blah, blah, blah. Yep, I was still ready to roll in the hay, or bounce on the water bed. We wiggled/sashayed back below and it was day-job-view all over again. Yep, we were naked and she was ontop. I had two hands full of mellon carrots and KNOCK, Knock, Knock....

    Missy froze, " I can't believe this ! "

    I wouldn't let go, " Let em knock ! Don't answer it ! "

    Missy pulled away, " No, you go answer it and if it's ...."

    So, I slipped on my pants and sashayed stomped. Missy stayed below, as I peeped out the peeper. Yep, you guesssed it !

    I jerked the door open, " What do you want ? "

    Sherry was all teary eyed, " I just need to talk to you. Can't we... "

    I cut her short, " LOOK ! You need to quit this and leave me alone ! Your Ole Man Scuffy is over at Hook's and ... "

    Sherry tried to bear hug me, " You have to hide me ! He's crazy and won't listen to me. I've done everything I can and he won't accept that it's over, between us. Please, I'm begging you ! "

    I gave the LOOK, " Get the hell away from me ! I've had enough and if you don't quit bothering me. Well, well, I'll, I'll, .... "

    So, I shoved her out the door and slammed it shut. I mean, what part of leave me alone.... You know, that's all I wanted. Yep, this was too much and more than I could deal with. Anyway, I sashayed below and you know who wasn't very happy. Yep, she'd gotten dressed again and was standing next to the bed.

    I sat on the waves, " Yeah it was Sherry, but she's gone now ! Why don't we take up, where we left off. I promise, if she shows up again.... "

    Missy wasn't sold, " I can't do this ! "

    So, I took her hand and guided her over. You know, and seated her next to me. Of course, all men know, when no, means no, and when it means, yes, yes, yes. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and kissed gently in her ear. She turned her head and tried to resist, so I forced her back and got her into a lip lock. You know, deep tongued her and hunched like a dog. She slowly gave in and began to responde. Yep, we were all set .. Knock, Knock, Knock... . What a deal, as Life Goes On.

    Nightie night Snazzrers, your Snazzy1.
  4. Ken

    Ken Couch Commander

    Oct 29, 2006
    Barney, you need to try a single woman.. And don't answer it this time.. It's Carrot's hubby.. :biggrin_25525:
    broncrider Thanks this.
  5. Snazzy1

    Snazzy1 The Storyteller

    Aug 21, 2007
    Granbury, Texas
    Kenmar suggest Missy's hubo, so let's see, as Life Goes On.

    I slipped on my boxers and left Missy naked in bed. I mumbled and sashayed up to the door and didn't even peep through the hole.

    I swung it open, " What do you want ? "

    Mike had his arm around Scuffy, " You need to come back over and settle up with Scuffy. You know, we can down a few beers and .... "

    I rolled my eyes, " Listen to me ! I'm busy right now and there's nothing to settle. Sherry was just here and I told her .... "

    Scuffy lunged at me, " I warned you ! She's mine and .... "

    Mike held Scuffy back, " Hold it Scuffy ! Barney can't help it if she's chasing after him and ..... "

    I heard enough, " Mike ! Get that Idiot out of here, or I'll kick his butt over his shoulders ! Now, ya'll go ahead and I'll be over in a minute. "

    So, Mike guided Scuffy towards Hook's. Yep, they were both so drunk that they had to hold each other up. Anyway, I sashayed back down and tried to get things going again. Of course, Missy had gotten cold as an icecube and didn't want to ... Well, you know ! Yep, she had gotten dressed and had her arms folded.

    I plopped on the bed and padded, " That was Mike and ... "

    Missy stood stiff as a board, " Well, you need to go and take care of things. This just isn't working out and .... "

    I batted my peepers, " Oh, come on ! They won't be back and the night is young. I swear, if anyone knocks on that door again... "

    Missy sat on the edge, " Well alright, but this is it ! "

    So, I pawed at her outfit and freed the melons, along with the snapping Beaver. You know, we were naked as Jay Birds and ready to rumble. I decided that a little foreplay was in order and assumed posistion # 14. You know, my chin was buried in the hair forest, with my shoulders under her thighs. She was on her back and looking down between the parted melons. Our hands were clasped and she had a look that I'll never forget.

    The Voice behind me spoke, " What the hell is going on ! "

    Nightie night Snazzers, your Snazzy1.
  6. Ken

    Ken Couch Commander

    Oct 29, 2006
    It appears that I was one knock too early with my last guess.. :biggrin_255:
  7. Dukesdad

    Dukesdad Light Load Member

    Aug 3, 2008
    toronto ontario
    Do you speak from experience there Ken?:biggrin_25515:
  8. Ken

    Ken Couch Commander

    Oct 29, 2006
    I'm innocent.. :yes2557:
  9. pjw044

    pjw044 Heavy Load Member

    Sounds like the "stuff" is about to hit the fan !
    Ya'll better duck...............:pain10:
  10. IcemanWife

    IcemanWife Bobtail Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    O'Kean, AR
    Hello, I have just finished reading all 191 pages, took me a week. This is some great stuff. Keep up the good writing.!!!
  11. Ken

    Ken Couch Commander

    Oct 29, 2006
    Is it time for a missing persons report?
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