In need of advice, what are my chances?

Hello folks I am an aspiring driver in need of some advice.
I am 26, no wife or kids, and no want of home time.

I have not been pulled over by a cop in over 3 years. My previous 10 year dmv printout was 7 points (worst offenses were a brief license suspension for an unpaid ticket and following too closely.) After speaking w/ DMV I recently got them to remove 4 out of the 7 points (I am uncertain which ones as I have not obtained the updated DMV printout yet.)

Everything sounds good? Well here's where it gets complicated for me.
I recently received a stay of proceedings for a misdemeanor assault 4 domestic violence case. Never plead guilty and never convicted... as long as I maintain no contact and no further criminal trouble the state is supposed to drop all charges in 2 years. My problem is apparently this is considered charges pending... at least that's what both CR England and Central Refrigerated told me when they turned me down. I also got turned down for a state grant (although honestly I don't think the lady there submitted it.. I think she just heard misdemeanor and nothing else..
)

I am redlining my brain here trying to figure out a way to get into a truck.
I have been disclosing this (perhaps foolishly) because I do not want to get taken on only to get dropped later.

It seems like no one wants to take the chance on me to help me get my CDL. If I manage to get the money myself before the 2 years is up I think I MIGHT have a better chance but who knows maybe not and I'm still screwed until these 2 years are up...

Once again my apologies for such a drawn out post... I impatiently dream about this lifestyle every day and would appreciate any wisdom you folks could grace me with....

 

I am actually currently in the process of obtaining that.
My understanding is that it should not show, however my arrest for it will, and the companies may question me regarding that.

This alleged incident took place when I was living in another state... just found out today by visiting my local courthouse and sheriff's office that their criminal background request only covers this state.
So tomorrow I gotta call the guy back at the school and see if he wants a federal background check from me or what...

arrggg this is becoming so much trouble trying to be honest about this.
I know there is a good chance if I said nothing they would not find it if they are only looking for convictions... but I don't wanna get accepted into a school/company only to get booted out afterward...