Lot Lizards and Other Riff-Raff

I go to the window with a Pork Chop around my neck. Case closed

 

I just hang a condom on the mirror.It will fit a 55 Gal.Drum.They leave even when I yell at them that Im up for a good time and I will be gentle.

 

By golly, you are right. I forgot to mention the Steak Sauce

 

Don't forget the fava beans and chianti.

 

that's rabbit food and poison.

What goes well with pork? eggs! And I am a water drinker

 

LMAO... reminds me of a thought I had a few days ago:

I was thinking it would be funny as hell to get a movie prop, like a severed human arm... or leg. Then, be ready with the fake blood. When they come knocking, squirt some blood on the arm, some on your face and then come to the window munching on it while you ask, "Why the hell are you interrupting my dinner?", with a crazed look in your eye.

Increase the effect by getting some of those black sclera contact lenses like the dude from Korn.

 

Dont forget to ask if they are hungry?

 

Stop scaring the professional company away,,,

 

You know, I've never had a problem out of the lizards. Just a simple "no thanks I'm married" takes care of all that. What does scare me is when the wife rides along and she can't even walk inside to use the restroom without some driver trying to talk to her or follow her. And, no my wife is far from looking like a lizard if anything she looks like just another driver. During the daylight she carries mace (not the spiked ball attached to a handle with chain but the spray kind) and a whistle and at night I walk her everywhere. #### shame drivers can't just be respectful to the ladies on the road.