Maverick .... from a wife's perspective

Latest update.

My mom entered hospice yesterday so I am leaving North Carolina tomorrow to go be with her. Redcoat was supposed to get his home time here in NC this weekend but he is going to call his FM and have it switched to my mom's house so we will both probably be heading in the same direction tomorrow.

Studying the route, looks like I'll be taking I-40W to I-85S to I-20W and then up Hwy 78 out of Birmingham. So if y'all go past me on the way, give me a wave.

Also, I'm not sure when I'll be able to post again but I get updates to this thread on my Blackberry so I will be able to read any updates. If the hospice house has wi-fi, then I'll be able to keep everybody posted but if you don't hear from me, at least you'll know why.

I'll know more about the situation once I get there.

Stay tuned.

 

Latest update.

I am now in Mississippi with my mom. They have a data port in her room so I am able to get online while she naps. She is wasting away and is down to 94 pounds. They seem to have finally gotten a handle on her pain meds using a combination of Percocet and morphine. She is propped up in bed with a myriad of pillows to help arrange her head, arms, and legs to take pressure off various areas that cause her pain. I feed her because her arms hurt so bad she can't lift them to feed herself. I feel so bad for her.

We are taking the end of her days as a matter of course. I am going through all her papers at home and sorting through them. As I have questions, I ask her and she tells me what the deal is so I can get it sorted out. We have already taken care of bank accounts, land transfers, etc. That was done months ago. Now I am tying up her affairs like car insurance, online accounts, email, and all the small stuff. When her time comes, everything will already be taken care of and I will be able to grieve in peace. In a way, I have already been grieving for the past year. But going through all her things at home, things that meant something to her and that gave her happiness, gets a little hard to bear at times. There are all her knick-knacks that she made in ceramics, her puzzle pictures, various crafts, and her quilts.

She was working on a quilt to match the decor of my RV and was within a week of having it done before she had to go into the hospital right after Thanksgiving. She was trying to get it finished for me as she knew in her heart that her time was short.

So I have gathered up the squares she had finished and I will sit beside her in her room while she guides my work and we will finish it together. She has already done all the hard work piecing the squares together. All I have to do is sew the rows together and finish the edges. I will post a picture of it when we finish.

Redcoat is on his way to Laredo, TX after doing a trailer swap in Ghent. They had to bring a forklift out to him so he could hook up because the legs wouldn't work with pressure on them. Once the forklift took the pressure off the legs, Redcoat could wind them up. He should be making delivery this afternoon and hopefully will be heading back this way in time for Christmas.

Stay tuned.

 

Stranger you are right about the funeral arrangements. They are all taken care of, paid for, and monument in place (when my dad died almost 2 years ago). Mom and I have been discussing what she wants to wear, what songs she wants played, who she wants to speak, and who she wants for the pall bearers. I have been writing the obit in my head for the last several months. Since I have done extensive family history research, I have all that type of information already. The part about describing the kind of woman my mom was is the part I'm mulling over in my mind.

As far as all her personal things, it really drives home the idea of "you can't take it with you." I'm glad I have already shed my various collections (music albums & CDs, Magic cards, candle holders, books, Eagles souvenirs, clothes, etc.) The digital age is a wonderful thing. The only things I have saved are a couple boxes of all my family history research and my military awards and paperwork which will go to my son to get handed down to my grandchildren. I'm sure somewhere down the line I will have a descendant who might be as interested as I was about their family history. Now that person will have a head start. I will have two quilts that my mom made and these I will hand down to my granddaughter. For myself, since I am a veteran and wish to be cremated, my funeral will be a tad simpler than my parents. I intend for my exit to be as uncomplicated as possible.