Newbies and Newbies wives

Discussion in 'Questions From New Drivers' started by 40Short, Apr 11, 2008.

  1. 40Short

    40Short Bobtail Member

    Apr 10, 2008
    Dallas, TX
    Hello and welcome to the open road. Probably by now you have completed your driving school (if Attended) and you are on the road. Just some helpful advice to make life a little easier for both you and the one you love. We shall start with the one giving the most sacrifice. The wife.

    You are the road warrior's wife. You lead the battle on the home front. My hat is off to you. You see the bills, pay the rent (or house payment), by the groceries, take care of the house, the children, the family. You attend the family events, ball games, school functions just so the man in your life may led in a world all by himself. Your man doesn't see the heartache, the stress, answering questions by the kids why Daddy isn't home. You don't have the luxury of taking a break away from the stress like you would if your man came home everyday. As a Truck Driver, the most that I can say is "Thank You" for putting up with this business. :biggrin_25514:

    You have it easy. Enough said. Yes driving a 80,000 lbs bullet down the road isn't easy, your worries are about what is happening at this moment and planning for the worst that might happen just ahead of you. Yes, making that money is important also and we can argue about all the others. The real work in on the home front and your not doing the battle your just trying to send the supplies to the troops. So remember, just be patient with the wife and don't patronize her. (example she says something about how difficult things are and your response is "Well, it difficult here too." :biggrin_25516:

    You made it, yes I mean the both of you.

    Why do you want to go home to see the family and sleep the whole time. Kids will be kids and making noise is part of being a kid. don't get mad that they are screaming, fighting or banging on things. Remember they are kids. You need to pull over get some rest prior to getting home.:biggrin_25518: I know after eating all the fried foods, Subway sandwiches and fast food the road has to offer; there is nothing better than a home cooked meal by your wife. Remember, your wife has been cook home cooked meals the whole time you have been gone. She wants to go out to eat and share quality time as a whole family. Hurray you get to eat out again.:biggrin_25511: It is your job as her husband to make her happy and you will have to suck it up and provide to her needs and wants. (smartly though)

    Your man has just drove who knows how many miles and he probably was out of hours when he arrived, so he is very tired but very very happy to be home. There is nothing better than having you and the kids running to greet him. Greet him with a HUGE SMOOCH! :smt058 Later you may want to do this :sex: after the kids go to bed for the night. LOL:laughing-guffaw: It is just a suggestion you know. Having your man home what a joy. Have his shower ready (he might need it):smt064 Enjoy the time that you have together you have both earned it. Yes he wants to take you out to eat but remember that is all he does. Eating out. Find a place that he likes to eat and go there. Make him a home cook meal the next time. That is something that he has been looking forward to for awhile now.

    Work together, and I mean TOGETHER on what needs to be done on the home front (i.e. bills, repairs etc). No need to get into an argument over the things that were there before you left. Remember this is a great time together.

    Yes it was very short. It seems to get shorter each and every time too. This sad day had to come.

    Give him something that reminds him of home. Get the kids involved as well. Give him a reason to be safe. Buy and prepare foods for him to eat on the road. Truck drivers love to snack. Have something that is health not heavy something to munch on is good for him. It shows how much you care about him. He doesn't need a bunch of stuff that will either spoil, get in the way or just not used. Ask him what he would like. The cost of living out here is HUGE. Each meal can cost at least $10, times 3 meals, time 30 days. That is $900 a month and every way that you can help cut that down is a help to your man and kids. You have something for him to eat on the road just for a couple of days can Save you more money.

    Give the family a hug and kiss. Tell your son that he is the man of the house and your daughters to be safe. If you can show the family the truck. Do a gear check, you know personal belongings (shaving gear, shampoo, blah blah blah). If you forget something, try to get by without it till you get back home. I am pretty sure that your wife has packed just about everything that you might need and the things that she thinks that you need.

    Never, ever, not even thinking about it, wasn't going to consider it, the merest thought had not yet began to speculate across your mind have an argument over the phone and just hang up the phone on the other person.

    Your man is riding a 80,000 death trap and depending on what company the he is driving for; at speeds up to 75 mph. This can distract him just enough to kill someone or himself. Is that worth losing the man that is doing his best to provide for you?
    Your wife is doing the best she can. It is your job to see that she has no reason to be stressing out more than she has already have. You hanging up on her tells her:
    1. You are not providing my needs.
    2. You have little regards to all the hard work I am doing.
    3. and the worst, YOU DON'T CARE
    If you do want to end the phone call, be considerate by at least stating that you are going to hang up the phone.

    Ok that is all for now. I am willing to help out as much as I can, and am willing to accept suggestions from other Driver's and their wives to make this driving world allot better place to live.
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  3. IROCUBabe

    IROCUBabe Road Train Member

    Apr 9, 2008
    Dallas, TX
    Now do one for the newly wed couple whom had only dated 3 months before deciding to get married and team together in a Peterbilt 379 with a 100lb child to boot :p
  4. Mrs. Bowmare

    Mrs. Bowmare Bobtail Member

    Apr 6, 2008
    LaGrange, GA
    Wow, that was great insight for the couple. I don't think I could let my husband join up for truck driving and not follow. My husband leaves in two weeks for C-1. We have plans for me to ride along once it is approved. In the mean time.....
    *bills will tight as hell :biggrin_25524:
    *I have a hormanal, bad attitude, rebel 14 years old to handle by myself for a month :biggrin_25510:(she has decided to move back to her mother),
    * I have to pack up the house - which includes a garage sell, self storage unit, & throwing away years worth of collections. How do you decide what to keep for the truck. That so far is going to be the hardest part.
    * pay bills
    * live with a friend until I can join him.
    * worry about him constantly being by himself in the "death bullet"

    Yeah, I would say wifes have a really tough job. My hat is off to truckers wifes. The drivers may carry 80,000 lbs, but a wife carries house, family, bills, work (if she is not a stay at home mom), church, school, lunch/dinner, cleaning, laundry, straps & booboo's, OH, don't forget - loneliness. :biggrin_25514: Yeah, the wife may have the rest of the family at home, but the one thing she wants most is to go to bed next to her husband. So she is lonely, just as much as the truck driver!
  5. driver4015

    driver4015 Medium Load Member

    Jan 28, 2008
    Bend ,Oregon
    both are very good posts,the wife/girlfriend for sure has it harder than a driver. I've always thought that a couple should have to spend three months in a peterbuilt before they can get they're marriage license. If you can make it thriugh that you just might make it.:biggrin_25523:
  6. IROCUBabe

    IROCUBabe Road Train Member

    Apr 9, 2008
    Dallas, TX
    LoL... yeah I'm wordering if I made a big booboo sometimes >.>
  7. ratchetjaw

    ratchetjaw Light Load Member

    Mar 30, 2008
    We have adapted fairly well. I suspect it has something to do with our ages, though. I was on my own for some time, raising 4 kids, so a lot of this is not unknown territory for me.
    He loves the job, not being gone, but the driving. I haul him to the market with me so he can get what he wants as far as food and snacks. (more time together!) Since he drives for a small company, I've taken the time to go to the terminal and introduce myself to dispatch and the staff, there. I figure if they know both of us and like me (and dispatch knows I have done that job before) it will be all the better for him. Office politics? Maybe, but if being a decent human being helps....
    I made a resolution to never, but NEVER, let him see me cry when he leaves. He knows I miss him and he misses me, that's enough. There is some sort of mental shift I make that switches my brain from "cry-mode" to "proud-mode." When he's out there I don't tell him bad news or problems, either. If there is something I can't handle myself, I'll find someone who can. It has helped immensely that the Thundering Herd has been making an astonishing effort to pick up their end of the deal, too. They have surprised both of us and we're really proud of them.
    First night home suppers? If I know he will be here I make something he really likes, if he surprises me I can usually put something good together in a very short time. We don't usually go out to eat because there isn't anywhere around here that is worth spending the money on.
    He talks about taking another local job but I suspect he won't do it. There is something about this life that gets in your blood, not only his but ours, as well. It isn't for everyone, though. I know some females who are so totally helpless that they can't figure out how to get from point A to point B without having someone tell them. There are some drivers who are scumbags, untrustworthy and have nasty minds and habits. People are people and that's all there is to that.
  8. AfterShock

    AfterShock Road Train Member

    Sep 19, 2007
    Inland Empire, California
    In MY opinion, it's those who keep the home fires burnin' who have the harder job.

    I remove my well worn NASCAR cap, stand at attention, and offer up my most snappy and sincere SALUTE :salute: to y'all.

    Job well done -----
    Carry on.
    Git 'er done. :biggrin_25514:

    BTW, 40Short --- excellent thread starter post. :yes2557:
    I see a green square in your immediate future.
    Yes I do. :biggrin_25525:

    Thanx to ALL of y'all. :biggrin_255: :biggrin_25514:
  9. flattoutbamafan

    flattoutbamafan Bobtail Member

    Nov 14, 2008
    Birmingham, AL
    Well, this is my first post and I am terrified! My husband is starting school 12/01 and is leaving after 20+ years in teh IT field. We have been married over 7 years and his last job had him out for 2 weeks at a time. So, this is just adding a week. I am lucky that I have really good firends, hobbies, my parents and 2 wonderful cats. I will still miss him though.

    I am a very emotional person. How do I stay strong for him and not show that I am upset? He has been out of work for almost 3 months now and I can't handle all the phone calls for money (how many times can I say I can't pay you before they will understand?) So, I am looking forward to him making some money finally.

    I KNOW I am a lucky woman. When we met I was 5'2" and weighed over 320lbs. I'm not 5'1.5" and 180-195 depending on the day. It didn't matter what I was he loves me and will stand beside me NO MATTER WHAT. I just want to be able to be the strong one and I don't know how. I am SO PROUD of him. he means everything to me and I really can't wait until I can retire and start team driving with him.

    I read the post at the opening of this thread and it was great...maybe I am just whining, I don't want to do that either.

    Course this means the house will be rearranged and fixed and painted and, and, and.....
    hehehe, he's gonna kill me
  10. Lilbit

    Lilbit Road Train Member

    Aug 4, 2008
    Let me check my logbook
    You'll get the hang of being a trucker's wife. Pop into the 'Ladies Room' on here, and you'll find a lot of other trucker wives that have gone through or are going through the same thing!
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