Question about refusing to go to a load in a particular state due not feeling experienced enough

Leaving the scene of an accident. The company GPS took me to an area where no trucks are allowed. It the only gps I have. What happened was that took out a freaking pedestrian traffic control light. I didn't even know it had happened until I was told about it by my driver manager 5 days later. All I can say is if my license is suspended, I'm not coming back to trick driving. I like it and all but I don't have the temperment for it. What will probably wind up happening is I will get so stressed out that I have a heart attack in the middle of the road.

 

And no I don't have a history of heart trouble.

 

I'm paying the fine no matter what. I will go broke before I get arrested or get my license suspended for not paying a fine.

 

All I am trying to do here is get my self back on my feet. I had been doing nothing just about for the past ten years because of my past. No one would give me a decent chance. I decided to try driving a truck. I like it. I really do. It's just that it seems like when. I get my life back on track to make myself a better person, some bullcrap happens. And I am being honest about all this. Yes I did. No I did not know I did it until five days after it had happened. And I got four tickets for it. So, I'm gonna pay the fines off and be done with it. I'm waiting to see what my liar, oops, I meant lawyer, can get done. After that, I'm done. The biggest reason why I like driving a truck is because I don't have someone staring over my shoulder every moment just about. I have a sense of freedom with it. However, if this can happen once, it can happen again. And I'm not gonna risk it.

 

Btw, my license is from NC. Not NJ.

 

Yes they are giving me a load going back to new Jersey. Then picking up one about an hour away in NJ. These ain't that bad though.

What I am worried about is if my license does get suspended in NJ, it will also get suspended in NC.

Also, the tickets I got have inaccurate information. They say I have no CDL and that I am driving a 2018 GMC. A freaking GMC. They haven't made 18 wheeler in at least a decade, if not more.