Serious replies onley, not a parody thread

It's so funny you guys mentioned tale sweng. I had a minor thing today where I completely destroyed the cornur of a billding, and now my company is unfarely charjing me with a pervenable acksident! What are my opshuns?

 

Was one of your wheels bent or hubs leaking preventing you from sliding the tandems back to eliminate the tail swing or were you too focused on a blue car in the parking lot and not paying attention to your trailer in the mirrors?

 

I was jamming out to some tunes in my Adidas track suit, and one of my sandals got caught on the fuel pedal. It could happen to any one of us at any time, so don't laugh.

 

You get a pass only if you were jamming out to the original while wearing those Adidas.

 

I love Public Enemy!

 

Options? Seppuku.

 

I have dishonored my bloodline.

 

You should have called the federal marshals, they would have given you assistance. They can block all the roads in town, then give you permission to run over anything in the way.

 

Ive only been rearended twice by the other drivers footwear getting stuck on the accelerator 2x... though both times it was their high heels...

(True story, both were at same intersection exactly 1 week apart, to the hour, same color and make of car hit us both times)

 

Ahhh the old New York "cop told me to run it over so I did!" counter tale. A classic.