So I have my CDL but am a functionally incompetent trucker. Now what?

I was in a Prius days before school

 

That’s really helpful

 

I

have to admit that this was really encouraging and really helpful. I appreciate it.

 

Amazing truck! Thanks!!

 

Some of my issue is that I can get the miles in and my teammates so far pressure me not to back. I back maybe once a week if that. I did actually catch my teammate. He said I was just horrible at backing. But eventually he slipped and said he was where I was when he was at my experience level. So now I am going to back constantly and yes, I’m going to go by a truck today.

 

I o

i over thinking things and was nervous in school. I treated the test as a learning experience that I was doomed to fail. So... the one time I was less scared than everyone else I did well. Now I get no time to back and I’ve had some toxic team and training experiences that just got in my head. It’s mental. It takes forever and I’m embarrassed so I quit. I should not. But it is what it is.

 

My straightlining sucked. I did worse on that than everything Else on the CDL. So I thought I was golden. No one mentioned “and now you will never offset or parallel again. Good for you.” So I admit I’m a baby trucker who watched all the yard jockeys moving like Beyoncé while I had a nerdy grade school 2 foot shuffle going on when I back. So I stared jealously for days. In fact I still stare when I’m being loaded. I eventually told an ex “ef it. I will keep cash on me and I will keep a push up bra. If I can’t back it in, someone somewhere will brake for boobs and a twenty or boobs or a twenty. I’m going to keep a solid hundred always just in case.” Lol. Redunk newbie actual reaction to Yard jockeys on the go.

 

I appreciate both sides of this argument. I can not argue with anyone passionate about safety and effort and hard work. I also really appreciate the desire of others to be encouraging to new truckers. For me I was passable at backing but it took forever. I had one teammate who spent my entire shift narrating how I would die or be murdered on the job. He had to take a 2 hour nap every shift to keep it up. A yard jockeys literally had to tell him “no. I’m not here to murder her because it took her more than 4 minutes” twice. I’ve met every toxic driver out here. It’s a hard job. I’m not bottom of the barrel. I’ve got common sense for days. I got into truck driving because...I had an ex who was a trainer that I was still friends with. I was a deans list nursing student. I injured my back. I needed to switch jobs to save for the next semester. I truly believed that I could go to any trucking school and 2 weeks later I would be awesome at this and he would think it was the sexiest thing ever and I was awesome. One week in I was crying to a instructor “that man must have cared about me more than I realized because he never told me how bad I am at any of this.” We actually started dating again because of that but I don’t want to quit trucking until I’m good at it. And I cannot ask him for help because I’m only sexy in a truck that is not moving that I haven’t backed.” Lol.